Gilmore Girls Season 1 Episode 4: "The Deer Hunters" Quotes
Lorelai: Can parents come?
Mom #1: What?
Lorelai: Yeah, it's a big exciting test. I just thought - I'm sorry, is that stupid?
Max: No, it's not stupid.
Lorelai: I just thought I'd like to see the excitement.
Dad #2: It's a test.
Lorelai: Yeah, I know.
Dad #2: What's exciting about a test?
Lorelai: Do you play golf?
Dad #2: Yes I do.
Lorelai: You explain yours, I'll explain mine.
What in the world?
</i> Lorelai
Michel: There's a man with a funny accent on the phone asking for you.
Lorelai: Really? Did you guys exchange the secret handshake?
Lorelai: Here is your 'serious' paper.
Rory: Thank you.
Lorelai: Ooh, and here are your somber highlighters, your maudlin pencils, your manic-depressive pens.
Rory: Mom.
Lorelai: Now, these erasers are on lithium so they may seem cheerful, but we actually caught them trying to shove themselves into the pencil sharpener earlier.
Rory: I'm going home.
Lorelai: No, wait! We're going to stage an intervention with the neon post-its and make them give up their wacky, crazy ways.
Rory: You're never coming shopping with me again.
Lorelai: Ooh, here's a card tray -
Waiter: May I be fired now?
Lorelai: Absolutely.
Behold, in theaters now, The Thing That Reads a Lot.
</i> Lorelai
Rory: Jeez, who's naked?
Lorelai: Uh, Lucien Mills, food critic.
Rory: Yeah? How's his butt?
Lorelai: No, no. He's supposed to review the restaurant.
Lorelai: Yeah. This school is so different from Stars Hollow you know. They send home like a thousand pages of updates every week. It's a very intense place.
Sookie: Uh huh.
Lorelai: Last week there was a huge debate over whether plaid scrunchies were acceptable head wear. People took sides, things got ugly, the scrunchie motion finally passed and I'd like to think I was the tie breaker.
Rory: Lorelai, go to your room!
Lorelai: Wow, smart girls are mean!
Luke: You look like you need pie.
Rory: I do?
Luke: Violent pencil tossing usually signals the need for pie.
Rory: What if I'd thrown a pen?
Luke: I would've brought you a trout.
Rory: What?
Luke: I don't make the rules, I just carry them out.
Rory: I have a test on Friday.
Lorelai: Ooh, a test. Great!
Rory: On Shakespeare.
Lorelai: The bard with a beard. Love it.
Rory: It's twenty percent of my grade.
Lorelai: Just makes life interesting. Now what do we have to do to get you an "A" on that test?
Rory: Do you really think I can do this?
Lorelai: I bet you a dollar.
Rory: That all? That's all my future's worth, one dollar?
Lorelai: Well, you did get a "D."
Rory: Oh my God, I just got hit by a deer!
Lane: You hit a deer?
Rory: No, I got hit by a deer!
Lane: How do you get hit by a deer?
Rory: I was at a stop sign and it hit me.
Lane: Was it a 4-way stop?
Rory: What does that matter?
Lane: I don't know. I don't know what to ask after you've been hit by a deer.
