[to Spencer] I'm actually kind of jealous of all the snooping around you've been able to do without detection. It's like you're Batman, only gay.


So, I figure that this is as good a place as any to ask you this question, mainly because it's going to really upset all the single guys and gals in here, but I want to mash up with you forever, Britt. I mean, some people love someone because they make them a better person and that's not why I love you because you've always just wanted me to be myself. You're my favorite person in the whole world and we're a big deal, you know? Like no matter how many times we've tried to put our thing down and walk away from it we can't because I don't want to live my life without my one true love. I normally I use a lot of words when I'm saying something negative so since this is the most positive thing I'm ever going to do, I'm gonna keep it simple. Brittany S. Pierce, will you marry me?


[to Becky] Oh, honey. All healthy relationships are built on lies! You know what? I'm pretty sure that's why I ended up divorcing myself.


Brittany: As a math genius, I am one of the few people who understand the concept of infinity and I will love you until infinity, Santana Lopez.
Santana: And I will love you until infinity too, Britt.

[to Santana] Okay, I may be a genius, but how can I argue with the logic of your giant, generous heart?


[to Spencer] You take Fred Flintstone off his brontasaurus, all he is is Wilma with a set of man plumbs. Conversation over.

Coach Beiste

Spencer: You want me to infiltrate the glee club and be terrible on purpose so everyone gets demoralized and quits?
Sue: Works every time.

Are you here to beat me up? Let me get into the fetal position first.


Sometimes if you want to make change you gotta make a little noise.


Rachel: I heard him. At least I think it's a him.
Kurt: Oh, let's not label or judge.

[to Kurt and Rachel] You two have just entered Sue Sylvester's Thunderdome.


[to Rachel] You were the very best the arts had to offer. Which means the arts clearly don't have much to offer now, do they? There is no glee club at this school. There will never be a glee club at this school as long as I'm in charge. Now get the hell out of here before I sick a convicted felon on you.


Glee Quotes

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.


I'm engorged with venom, and triumph.