Favorite House Quotes
I'm gonna pretend to go to work now.
Is that a pill in your pocket, or are you just happy to have a tiny pill-shaped penis?
My head's on your vagina.
Thirteen: We all want the same things: love, forgiveness, chocolate.
Hi. I'm Dr. House. How long have you been a psychopath?
I'm sick of being miserable.
House: Miserable stays miserable. Happy doesn't buy lottery tickets in the first place.
Thirteen: Our level of happiness is set. It's in our DNA. No cash payout's gonna change that.
House: It's like there's two of me.
House: So I hope I didn't weird you out giving you that gift.
Dr. Cuddy: Can we talk about this later?
House: Of course. Is now later?
Dr. Cameron: What did Cuddy want?
House: I kinda hit that last night, so now she's all on my jock.
Thirteen: Wow, she looks pretty good for someone on roofies.
House: He's a self-important jerk,
Wilson: Seems to be what I'm attracted to.
And the bitch is back.
House: You're invoking the guy code?
Wilson: We're guys. It's a code.