Gibbs: Tobias? What the hell’s going on?
Fornell: What’s going on? You got me fired!

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

We’re all as sick as our secrets, Clay, and we all need someone to talk to. Even you.

Bishop

McGee: You and Zoe broke up?
Tony: You heard.
McGee: Why didn't you tell me?
Tony: Well the break-up bug's going around. Didn't want you to catch it.

Palmer: No. I don't want to.
Ducky: You don't want to what, Mr. Palmer?
Palmer: I don't want to know how much her liver weighs. I don't want to catalogue her scars. Most of all, I don't want to cut open another friend. Think I've had my limit.

Man up, Marine!

Gibbs

Bishop: Zero zero, one one zero.
McGee: You're welcome.

Always be specific when you lie. (Season 1, Episode 23)

Rule #7

Vance: Sometimes I like to *eat* my meal, not *sip* it.
Kayla: Diner food isn’t a meal!

Ziva: Bah hum-bog.
Tony: What?

In high school, I was actually voted least likely to take a hint.

Susan

NCIS Quotes

Gibbs: Tobias? What the hell’s going on?
Fornell: What’s going on? You got me fired!

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott