NCIS
Mondays 9:00 PM on CBSNCIS Quotes
Fornell: Get your hands off that light switch! You'll ruin the mood.
Gibbs: "The mood"? We gonna make out? What?
Fornell: I'm just trying to express my appreciation for your hospitality and friendship.
Gibbs: You wanna show your appreciation? Stop wearing my clothes!
Dr. Grace [about Quinn's prying]: She's new, Gibbs, but you have her well-trained! What's next? You gonna take me downstairs to your torture room and try to squeeze something outta me?
Gibbs: Sure. What's your preference? Stock a little waterboard, a little bamboo under the fingernails?
Let's go back to what we know -- he's dead. I'm pretty confident about that.
Torres
And the hair slowly went up on Agent Quinn's neck!
Quinn [meeting Abby]
I've been to drug lord torture rooms less scary.
Torres [on the NCIS interrogation room]
Does she normally water the bird feeder?
Quinn [on an elderly woman's routine]
Bishop: Gibbs is famous for coming in just before the weekend starts and saying--
Gibbs: Grab your gear!
Everybody I never wanted to see again, all in one room.
Neil Sherwood [on the high school reunion]
Torres: He knew we were gonna meet here.
Gibbs: How do you know that?
Torres: Because he planted a bomb under my seat. I activated the pressure trigger when I sat down.
Gibbs [sees the bomb and grins]: And you're waiting until now to tell me that?
Torres: Well, I was in the middle of something. How does it look?
Gibbs: Hm, like it may hurt for a second!
Torres: You are enjoying this.
Gibbs: Oh, yeah. A little.
Quinn: Left behind some scorned women, huh, Gibbs?
Gibbs: I have no comment.
You have a doorbell?
Fornell [to Gibbs]
Silva: We were all concerned!
Torres: Oh, yeah, the guys you sent to kill me looked real worried.