NCIS
Mondays 9:00 PM on CBSNCIS Quotes
Emma: Can I ask you a favor?
Abby: Yeah.
Emma: Will you watch Dave for a while?
Abby: Sure! Why?
Emma: My parents got me a bus ticket to Nebraska.
Gibbs: What do you think, Duck?
Ducky: It was not that texting driver that killed the ensign, but that damned fool should be stripped of both his phone and his car.
Cabot: As you know, the Navy is trying harder than ever to eradicate sexual assault in their ranks.
Gibbs: Was Ensign Tate a rape suspect?
Cabot: Right to the point, as always. No Gibbs, Tate was a second-party complainant. He reported an assault on behalf of a friend.
Vance: So, why is the victim denying it now?
Cabot: Take your pick, sir. Shame, fear, loss of peer status.
Farrell: I can usually handle my margaritas but halfway through my second I felt like I had chugged a whole bottle. So I headed back to the ship early.
Cabot: As the only female JO you had your own quarters?
Farrell: Next morning I can't say I woke up. It was more like I came to. I felt beaten up, like I'd been through a cement mixer. At first I was so mortified I felt like I'd done something terrible. So then I just hit the showers and pretended like it never happened. The next few weeks I felt worthless, paranoid. I mean, even with my friends I had no idea who attacked me so I couldn't help but wonder if maybe they did. I swear it was like I was losing my mind.
Gibbs: You've been saving that one, Mo!
Cabot: You have no idea.
Tony: How long?
McGee: Just this once? Okay it's been the whole time. We've been working late. I was weak.
Tony: I don't even know who you are anymore.
McGee: Wait, please, I have another one. Here. Take it. It's yours.
Tony: You can't buy me with your pepperoni. I want steak. Creamed spinach. French fries.
Bishop: Can I get in on this?
McGee: Yes. Absolutely. Steaks all around, my treat. Let's go.
McGee: Look you've only been back to work a week. Maybe you should slow down.
Delilah: Slow down?
Gibbs: Delilah, what he's saying is let us check it first. Right Tim?
Samson: I only ran to keep up with appearances. The fake punches were a great touch though.
Tony: Those were real punches.
Samson: That's funny. I like you.
Palmer: Don't worry. He's as high as a kite.
Troutman (groggy): Wait. I know you.
McGee: Jimmy.
Palmer: Or not.
Troutman: Are there violent chinchilla babies here too?
McGee: They were here.
Troutman: No!
McGee: But we got rid of them.
Troutman: God bless you.
Delilah: With this case, he thinks I'm trying to lose my job but I'm not. It's the opposite. I'm trying to show that I can do more, to move up.
Tony: I can understand that.
Delilah: Because there's this senior analyst opening in Dubai.
Tony: Dubai is not here.
Delilah: I know. Which leads me to another thing that I need to tell Tim.
Jones: If I'd know you were coming I would have stayed and baked cookies.
Tony: Hey. I have to ask.
Jones: Brisco kept me so high I barely remember crawling out of that place on my hands and knees. I found a gun that he left behind and I hid in a storm drain across the street until the drugs got out of my system. Agent DiNozzo, if I was in on this, why would I risk coming back for Melody?
