Jonathan: Oh, you're using Ben's opening night gift?
Stage Manager: Yeah, I didn't think I'd need it so soon.
Howard: It really is a beautiful gift.
Stage Manager: I didn't realize assistants got one too.
Howard: And I didn't realize stage managers wiped their noses with anything other than the bottom of their palms.
Stage Manager: You've got crumbs in your beard.

• Permalink: You've got crumbs in your beard.
• Added: August 08, 2023

OK, secret, I think theater is kind of lame. People all dressed up in costumes no real person would ever wear, acting like nobody's sitting out there watching them say things no real person would ever say. But at least this piece of theater is a murder mystery. That, I can get my head around. And every murder mystery needs a victim.

Mabel

• Permalink: OK, secret, I think theater is kind of lame. People all dressed up in costumes no real person...
• Added: August 08, 2023

Howard: We thank you for your attention. Brief anecdote. I remember when I auditioned for Mr. Oliver Putnam for this very play.
Oliver: True.
Howard: Do you remember what you said to me, Oliver?
Oliver: I sure do, I said. How about you be my assistant instead?
Howard: That's right. Word for word.

• Permalink: That's right. Word for word.
• Added: August 08, 2023

Charles: I know you're nervous. I know your last Broadway show was a disaster. Everyone knows that. The world knows it.
Mabel: Fast forward, fast forward.
Charles: But you, sir, are a talented young man. You have a gift for leadership. And when you ask me to join this production.
Oliver: Hold, please. I asked you?

• Permalink: Hold, please. I asked you?
• Added: August 08, 2023