Are you kidding me? Kukudio is a suspect and I'm not? Heck I killed a cop with his own gun. Oh. Wait...Did I get caught for that? [sighs] I'm getting old.

Frieda

Red: If they question you, do not speak to them. They'll tell you someone has already confessed. Do not believe it. It's a manipulation.
Frieda: Another manipulation? They hit you repeatedly in the face.

Hey, hey, no. I was not questioning your methods. All right, I totally respect your badass authority that flies in the face of Caputo's authority.

Luschek [to Piscatella]

So, like, we didn't get to finish dinner, so are we gonna, like, get a second dinner like hobbits or....

Crazy Eyes

Alison: You're ruining the film.
Cindy: I thought you didn't even like it.
Alison: Well, I love it now.

McCullough: You boys are all teenagers.
Stratman: Hey, I didn't do anything!
McCullough: It's like when a dude date rapes a girl at a frat house. It's everyone's fault.
Stratman: Exactly, 'cause we're in a brotherhood. Even you, McCullough. And Humps, he's just our weirdo roach-liquefying kid brother. Maybe Ramos was causing trouble, right? Or... or Humps was having a bad day. We don't know. What we do know is, we're the ones on the ground making the tough calls every day.
McCullough: I mean, it's not like we have any proof.
Stratman: Yeah. He could have been making her a sandwich for all we know.
McCullough: Yeah.
Stratman: Yeah.

I don't know what poison you and your hillbilly friends are peddling, but if you sell any of it to Nichols, you will never know what's really in your food, and I assure you, I can slip in untold horrors.

Red

Do you ever feel like a person without a country?

Doggett

Listen, if your mind is starting to go, just tell me and I'll mercy break your neck, so you don't end up in Psych.

Gloria [to Sister Ingalls]

I mean, sure, it's a little Abu Ghraib-y, but...sure.

Dixon

You know, you can cheat on your wife with hookers who indulge your diaper fetish and still be the senator from Louisiana, so long as you apologize.

Judy King

Come on. You're like a cockroach, Diaz. When we're all dead, you still gonna be crawling around the garbage, saying mean sh*t to the other roaches.

Gloria

Orange is the New Black Quotes

When God gives you a swastika, he opens a window. And then you remember, there is no God.

Red

I like hot girls. And I like hot boys. I like hot people. What can I say? I'm shallow.

Piper