Reaper Season 1 Quotes
Sam: Are you trying to get back together with Josie?
Sock: What? I... I am trying to make amends, Sam, okay? And if she chooses to thank me in a naked or partially naked way, well that's okay too. I'll take it
Sock: Do you remember a few years back, when there was a fire at Josie's apartment?
Sam: Yeah, right before you guys broke up.
Sock: Do you remember it was around the time I was exploring my feminine side.
Sam: No.
Sock: Well, mostly I was into jasmine-scent candles.
Sam: Did you burn down Josie's apartment?
Sock: It's a dark part of life, Sam. I'm not proud of it
Sock [about Sam dating the Devil's potential daughter]: We need proof.
Ben: Yeah, he doesn't want to babysit your kids with horns.
Sock: No.
Sam: Yeah, well you're not going to have to worry about that, because I would never let you babysit my kids.
Sock: Smart
Andi: So what's wrong with her?
Ben: She's a huge fan of Lionel Ritchie.
Sock: Isn't that messed up?
Andi: Oh yeah.
Ben: All Night Long.
Sock: We think she's the spawn of Satan.
Andi: Later
Free booze, hot Asian girls, and the smell of grease. I am home!
Sock
Sam: How did you find me?
Sock: We followed you, Sam. Ben drove here with his headlights off the entire time.
Ben: It was very stressful
Ben: The Devil has a child. You know, I never thought the Devil had genitals.
Sock: What, like a Ken doll?
Sock: This Satan's trying to get you to hook you up with his daughter, you know, I bet she wants your man seed.
Sam: What? No.
Sock: Yeah, sure, think about it. You knock her up, right, the Devil has a little Sam baby running around catching souls for him when he grows up. After, you know, you kick. [Sam glares] Which I hope will not be for a very long time
Sam: I think you really cared about her.
Devil: Want to see how much I cared about her? [snaps fingers] She's dead.
Sam: What?
Devil: That's right. With the snap of my fingers, Mimi just got hit by a bus. Gruesome. Can't tell her from the pavement. And that's on you, buddy.
Sam: You sick son of a...
Devil: Oh, calm down, hero. I'm screwing with you. Mimi's fine
Sock: We got presents! Look. Bought your grandmother a book. It's in Spanish.
Ben: It's French.
Sock: What? Oh. Well, you know, it's never too late to learn a new language
Devil: I made no promises. My conscience is clear.
Sam: You don't have a conscience.
Devil: Oh yeah, that's right, what a break
No, no, nothing is impossible. Illegal, yeah, stupid, most definitely, but not impossible
Sock