Scrubs Season 3 Quotes
J.D.: Do you have to do that here?
Danni: What? I like smoking after sex.
J.D.: And during. God, you never used to smoke!
Danni: Yeah, but back then I was pretending to be someone I thought you wanted me to be, and that didn't work. So now... I'm gonna let the real me come out.
Dr Cox: I went ahead and took a look at your little rock star's chart.
Dr. Miller: Oh, didja?
Dr. Cox: Yes, I did. And his urine output is dropping, so you should probably start him on Lasix.
Dr. Miller: You amuse me. So even though he's post-op and still technically my patient, I'm gonna pretend to consider your opinion before I walk away and do whatever I want! Hmm. No!
Dr. Miller: Oh, yeah. That incision's healing up nicely.
Jeff: Thanks again, Dr. Miller. I'm gonna have my band write a song about you.
Dr. Miller: Well, I'm glad I struck a chord!
Dr. Cox: Yeah, listen: While you were proving once and for all that pretty girls do not in fact need to be funny...
Elliot: Listen, J.D... Last night was really important to me.
J.D.: I know. I mean, you don't want to be rusty at sex before you throw down with your real boyfriend, do ya?
Carla: Bambi, when you broke up with Danni, you said it was the happiest day of your life!
J.D.: No, that was only because 'Barney Miller' came out on DVD.
Turk: And WoJo's commentary on it? Priceless!
Dr. Miller: Okay, that's all from me, Jeff. Any other questions you might have you can direct to Dr. Cox, here. I'm sure you'll find him to be quite... something!
Dr. Cox: Ha-ha!
Janitor: My cousin is a bank teller, and he gave me one of those exploding ink cartridges they put in stolen money so I could figure out who's been disconnecting the emergency exits!
He finds Dr. Kelso standing there, covered in blue ink.
Dr. Kelso: Nice work.
Listen, Serpico, I go four steps out that door to my car every day. And that's important, because if I don't beat Enid home from her thighs & buns class, I have to help her peel off her leotard.
Dr. Kelso
J.D.: So, you'd rather hang out with someone you don't even like than be alone?
Danni: Yeah, pretty much.
J.D.: Yeah, me too. I mean, come on, how many couples out there actually have fun together?
Sean: Guys! Elliot and I are in the middle of a marathon game of Hide & Go Seek. If she comes in, you didn't see me!
J.D.'s Narration: In a big hospital, you can hide from almost anything. Except your conscience.
Jordan: Hello.
Dr. Cox: Oh, hey! Hey, Jordan! You know what's weird?
Jordan: Tell me.
Dr. Cox: We're so close, and yet if anybody asks if we're married, all either one of us can say is-is no.
Jordan: Actually, I say we were married for five years then got divorced, now we're back living together, have a child, but we're in a long-term, committed relationship.
Dr. Cox: Yeah, that's what I say, too... That or... no.
Dr. Kelso: Okay. This badge is now yours.
Janitor: I just want to thank you for believing in me. And I want to assure you that I am gonna be guarding these hospital gates the way Cerberus guarded the gates of Hell!
Dr. Kelso: Yeah, that's terrific.
Dr. Miller: Excuse me, I need to get a, uh-
Dr. Cox: Book about supply closet etiquette? Yeah, look, I'm kinda using this area?
