Scrubs Season 3 Quotes
Turk's Narration: What now, you mean witch?
Dr. Miller: I'm sorry, but if you act like a cartoon character in front of one of our patients again, I'm gonna spend the next ten years introducing you as the guy who sponges off my forehead. Okay, we're done. Bryan! Dr. Turk is gonna take you back to your room.
Dr. Cox: That was... that was glorious.
Dr. Miller: Okay.
Damn, Elliot's got a nice ass for a white chick! Stop it! Just 'cause you're panicked about getting married doesn't mean you have to reduce every woman to her physical attributes... Oh, great, my new scary boss and her amazing chest, butt, feet... I love feet.
Turk's Narration
Elliot: What are you doing here? I thought you had like two days off?
J.D.: Had to pick up a mouth guard from oral surgery. Some of the kids at the park said I couldn't jump Jones Creek on my bicycle; so now I gotta give 'em the 4-1-1 on my mad daredevilin' skills!
Elliot: Meanwhile, back in adult world... I was just given twelve new admits and now there's no way that I can be a clown for the kids today!
Turk: Are you a good pianist?
Turk's Narration: "Pianist"! Heeheehee!
Bryan: Yeah, I got a scholarship to Juilliard.
Turk: Bry-Bry! You're in the money! Girl's love the artsy type - you'll be getting more tail than you know what to do with.
Bryan: Ohhh, okay.
Turk: "Tail" is sex, Bryan.
Bryan: Ohhh! Awesome!
Elliot: [on phone] Sean, I'm just bummed that I'm so busy I might not be able to do this clown thing today. I know I'm a doctor first, but what about that summer I spent at clown academy? I mean, it's starting to seem like that was just a giant waste of time. I wish you were here. I can't believe you've been in New Zealand for 5 months.
Sean: [on phone] I can't believe you still haven't figured out the time difference. It's 4 A.M. here!
I'm sorry... It's just I miss talking to you... I miss seeing you... I even miss that weird way you sleep with your eyes open.
Elliot
Dr. Kelso: Wow! Perry, people usually don't stop caring about what you have to say 'til after they've been here a few months! Oh, no he didn't!... That's the correct use of that phrase, right?
Dr. Miller: I don't know, sir.
Dr. Miller: Has anyone seen Dr. Kelso? We're supposed to leave for that luncheon.
Dr. Cox: Oh, that's strange. Because I remember having a conversation with you about this very subject - never do anything with him, pure evil - ringing any bells?
Dr. Miller: Just the one in my head that goes off when I'm incredibly bored.
Carla: Okay, okay, okay. So how far over the Creek did you make it?
J.D.: I don't know the exact distance in terms of feet and inches, but in laymen's terms, I would have to say... about halfway.
J.D.: Dr. Reid couldn't be here today, children, so I'm here in her place.
Kid: Why're your pants so tight? Clowns have baggy pants!
J.D.: Well, Brad, I'm the type of clown that likes to wear tight pants.
Kid: But the other clown has baggy pants!
J.D.: What other clown?
Janitor: Hello, old friend.
J.D.: Janitor!
Turk: Heeeey! Bry-Bry! What's the happie-haps!
Bryan: My hand is feeling really weird.
Turk: Ummm, about that...
Turk's Narration: "I made a mistake"! Just say it! I made a mistake!
Turk: I'm not really too sure on the specifics, but uh... apparently there were some complications.
Turk's Narration: Ah, ya big chicken!
Bryan: I could never get a girl like that.
Turk: Why?
Bryan: Well, girls don't usually go for the piano-playing power geek.
