Seinfeld Season 3 Episode 6: "The Parking Garage" Quotes
You know, I've been issued a public urination pass by the city because of my condition. Unfortunately, my little brother ran out of the house with it this morning. Him and his friends are probably peeing all over the place.Jerry
George: If I am not in front of my building at 6:15 when my parents get there, they are going to put me on an aggravation installment plan that will compound with interest for decades.
(to George) You get within fifteen feet of that woman, she'd have her finger on the mace button.Jerry
I'm trying to live my life!George
George: What's the difference? We'll all be dead eventually?
Kramer: Does that bother you?
George: Yeah, it bothers me. Doesn't it bother you?
Kramer: Not at all.
George: You see, now, that bothers me even more than dying bothers me, because it's people like you who live to be 120 because you're not bothered by it.
Unbelievable. I'm never gonna get outta here. Guy goes to pee, he never comes back. It's like a science-fiction story.George
We're like rats in some experiment.George
(Kramer is carrying an air conditioner box)
Jerry: Will you let me help you with that?
Kramer: I'm gonna put it down behind that car.
Jerry: Worried somebody's gonna pee on it?
The problem with the mall garage is that everything looks the same. They try to differeriate between levels. They put up different colors, different numbers, different letters. What they need to do is name the levels, like, "Your mother's a whore." You would remember that.Jerry
There's too much urinary freedom in this society.Jerry
I can't carry a pen, I'm afraid I'll puncture my scrotum.George
George: Fish. What do they do?Elaine: What do you do?