That 70's Show Quotes
Is the kid from not America down here?
Red
Red: Okay, Bob, what is it?
Bob: I'm just curious. What's the word on that Hyde kid?
Red: Steven? He's a little rebellious, just needs some direction.
Bob: Apparently he's getting it, Red. I kind of walked into your living room and he and Kitty were in some sort of provocative embrace. I think he's putting the moves on your wife.
Red: Oh my God. Now I've gotta kill him. Get your deer rifle, Bob.
Bob: Hold on Red. I... I... I could have been mistaken.
Red: You know what you saw. Get the damn gun!
Disco is from hell, okay. And not the cool part of hell with all the murderers, but the lameass part with the accountants.
Hyde
Eric: I like you.
Donna: So... you're in like with me?
Kelso: Jackie, where'd you go?
Jackie: I had to get something for you to bite on cause I told everyone you were having a seizure!
Where's my toast, you idiots?!
Fez
Fez: Kelso is my friend, I cannot take his woman.
Hyde: You're a good man, Fez.
Fez: Actually, I could take his woman, but I won't.
Hyde: ...Let's drink beer!
Kelso: Me first!
Donna: No way! I spotted it!
Kelso: Nah, I saw it too. I just didn't say anything!
Hyde: You saw a keg and you didn't say anything?! BACK OF THE LINE!
Eric: I stole my dad's tap--
(he sees his father, with the cops)
Eric: ...back from those thieves.
Eric: Alright, how do you get the beer out?
Hyde: Through the tap.
Eric: What tap?
(everyone notices there isn't a tap on the keg.)
Hyde: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Kitty: I don't know if we have enough ice, Eric took a whole tubful.
Red: He took a tub of ice?
Kitty: Oh, the kids are making a volcano!
Midge: Right, that's why Donna left with all the plastic cups.
Red: Plastic cups?
Midge: Sure, plastic volcano cups.
Bob: If I didn't know better, I'd say they were having a kegger! (looks at Red) Oh Jeez!
Destroy: Hey, Kelshmo, what, your tap is broken? Why did you do something stupid like buy a stupid, broken tap? What are you? Stupid?
Kelso: It wasn't broken until you broke it!
