Nick: I accidently pressed the panic button on my new fancy, shmancy phone. It's like a super computer.
Pete: I told him it was too complicated for him.
Nick: You can take over the world with this damn thing.
Pete: He just got rid of his landline.
Nick: I mean it even takes pictures.

I don't trust him one little bit. His eyes are too close together.

Zoe

I'm tense. I eat when I'm tense!

Nick

Pete: Next time you're round these parts, give me a ring.
Nick: Shut up.
Pete: I'll take you out for a beer.
Nick: I swear to god, I'll punch you in this face this time.

Lisa: What's the "D" stand for though? Nicky Defense? Nicky Do-Right? Nicky Donut?
Zoe: Nicky Dice? Nicky Danger.
Pete: Nicky Doofus.

Who comes back a week early from Tahiti?

Pete

Nick: What is this, a shakedown before lunch?
Pete: Why don't you grow a mustache it'll be cheaper.

If you were afraid you were going to lose them forever, what would you do?

Nick

This town was built on dirty money, Kaczmarek. Is that news to you?

Judge

Meredith: You're very sexy when you try to take on the system even though you know you're argument is going to lose.
Pete: Is that a challenge?

Sam, I think it's best we don't tell your mom about this.

Nick

Fine me. Not gonna make you a better judge.

Nick