Favorite The Office Quotes
Last week I would've given a kidney to anyone in this office. I would've reached right into my stomach and pulled it out for them, but now, no. I don't have the relationship with these people that I thought I did. I hope they ask so they can hear me say, "Uhh...no, I only give my organs to my real friends. Go get yourself a monkey kidney."Michael
Everyone, guys. Circle up, please. Come on over. Bring your chairs. Toby, come on over. You're a guy... too. Sort of.Michael
Michael: Tube city. You owe me one.
Jim: [interview] Co-managing is a give and take. You have to pick your battles. One of the battles I picked was Michael's idea of running plastic tubes all over the office with hamsters inside of them. He called it Tube City. So, yes, I do owe him one.
Michael: "Women in the Workplace." Yeah. Translation: I have been banned from my own conference room so that Jan can talk in secret to all the girls - oh, sorry "women of the workplace." About what? I don't know. Clothes. Me.
Five minutes ahead of schedule... Right on schedule.Dwight
Ryan: Did you see Saw?
Dwight: Of course I seesaw, Mose and I seesaw all the time.
Michael: This is Creed, and he is in charge of... something... right?
Creed: That is correct.
Disposable cameras are fun, although it does seem wasteful and you don't ever get to see your pictures. If it's an important event, that you want to remember, I recommend using a real camera.Erin
Michael: You, my friend, would be da belle of da ball. Don't drop da soap. Don't drop da soap.
Ryan: Michael, please.
Kevin: Oooh, now do the Swedish chef!
Andy: I'm not familiar, what province is he from?
Kevin: He lives on Sesame Street, you dumbass.
Michael: I am a victim of a hate crime. Stanley knows what I'm talking about.
Stanley: That's not what what a hate crime is.
Michael: Well I hated it. A lot!
Dwight: Don't you want to earn Schrute bucks?
Stanley: No. In fact, I'll give you a billion Stanley nickels if you never talk to me again.
Dwight: What's the ratio of Stanley nickels to Schrute bucks?
Stanley: The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns.