I wonder if king size sheets are called presidential sized in England. I really should have a tweeter account.


Excuse me, the tone here is getting quite hostile. I would appreciate it if you would keep that stuff on the basketball court.


Neither of those looks like any person that has ever existed or been dreamt of in the history of human insanity.


Andy: How do you not have a toothbrush?
Erin: I just, there's always one around.

I think you're a witch.

Pam (to Nellie)

Jim: The raise isn't real.
Dwight: Money isn't real ever since we got off the gold standard.

Those who can't farm, farm celery.


Trust you? The way Pam trusted you to provide for her so she wouldn't have to work?


Jim: Can't you do something about this?
Robert: Sometimes the flowers arrange themselves, Jim.

The fact that she could show her face around here is an embarrassment. I should know, I'm in an identical situation.


That is disgusting. Do you call that a King James Breakfast Pie?


Nellie: You may not cancel his soul.
Robert: That was never on the table.

The Office Season 8 Quotes

A fluke is one of the most common fish in the sea, so if you go fishing for a fluke, chances are you just might catch one.


Robert you got your sheep, and you got your black sheep, and I'm not even a sheep. I'm on the freakin' moon.