Favorite Joel McHale Quotes
You ruined Christmas dinner so that you could be crowned the smartest person at the dumbest school?
Jeff
Jeff: It's Macallan 18. I like to serve it neat, if that's okay with you.
Professor Cornwallis: What, in America? Don't you mix it with cherry pop or Monterey Jack cheese?
Britta: So you just left your section blank.
Jeff: No, of course not! I copied and pasted the lyrics to "War (What Is It Good For)."
Holy makes-complete-sense-at-this-school!
Jeff
Britta: Psychology tells us there are no accidents.
Jeff: What about car accidents, Tara Reid, or the Hindenburg?
Jeff: I thought I told you to stop reading my emails.
Dean Pelton: Well, I thought I told you to stop keeping secrets!
Shirley: Is this a bad time?
Dean Pelton (speaking as Jeff): I'm at Greendale, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum, so yeah, I'd say it's half past suck.
I thought this was America, not Arizona.
Jeff
Carl, I see you've grown a new douchebag.
Jeff
Quick impression--waaaa. Who am I? You guys.
Jeff
Well, it's official--it's on a banner.
Jeff
William: So, how about we make a couple of ground rules.
Jeff: Actually, that sounds good. Okay, no hugs.
William: Wouldn't want one. No apologies.
Jeff: Wouldn't accept one.
