Sammi: Why are you with me?
Ronnie: I'm in love with you. Why? I can't help the way I feel.

Mike's definitely a pot stirrer, yes, he likes to cause a lot of problems and then go take a nap after he does it.

Sammi: If I ever were to ever meet him, I would be like 'Hell no.'
Ronnie: You did meet him, and you made out with him.

Ronnie: Angelina cheated on Jose.
Sammi: Ronnie told Jose she was his boo. But then she smashed Vinny. Therefore, if she says she's my friend, that means she's not my friend.
Ronnie: We really need to improve our school system.

[on the bed] My children, Pauly's children, Snooki juice.

Jose is definitely getting played. (pauses) Like a piano.

Angelina smushed Vinny the other night. She's all over Jose tonight. She got game. Can't hate.

You want your space, I'll leave you alone.

Right away, I know it's Snooki or Jenni. But then I read the letter and see the word 'wisely' and I know Snooki doesn't use that kind of vocabulary.

I'm definitely not a saint. If I walked into a church, I'd probably burst into flames to be honest with you. [But] I think I can probably talk my way out of the hole I dug. I mean, how deep is a grave?

Sammi: I'm done.
Ronnie: Do you want this or you don't?

She's beating a dead horse at this point. At some point when the horse is dead you gotta leave it alone.

Ronnie Magro Quotes

Mike would bang a Gatorade bottle if it had a pulse.


I was trying to put you in the equation. Like, you, in the equation!