Alan: This may be your house, but this is my son.
Charlie: But you've been living here for seven years, which makes us a common law couple, which makes him our kid.


Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (2 Votes)
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Characters:
Charlie Harper, Alan Harper
Episode:
Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 11: "Warning, it's Dirty"
Show:
Two and a Half Men
Related Quotes:
Charlie Harper Quotes, Alan Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 11 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 11 Quotes

Alan [about Marty]: Mom, are you and he...
Evelyn: Good Lord, no. The man is a thousand years old. It's a wonder his scrotum doesn't get tangled up in the wheels.

Charlie: Speaking of generosity, check out what I got Chelsea.
Alan: Diamond earrings, nice.
Charlie: Yeah, she dropped a couple hints about stuff she wanted, but I wasn't really listening, so I bought her these.