Mulaney: Come on father I earned it. I went to church every Sunday for twelve years, and once in college when my girlfriend thought she was pregnant.
Father: Was she with child?
Mulaney: No, and you know it is way harder to get pregnant than you people told us. Look, just do this for me and you will never have to see my again.
Father: We are the Catholic church, we want to see you again, that's our goal.