Well, after I got discharged, my PTSD got worse. Not from anything I'd done in the service from what was done to me, being raped rapidly. That was bad enough but what was almost worse was to be told it didn't happen. I actually thought I was going crazy. Maybe I was in a relationship and I hadn't realized it. Maybe I'd implied consent for this man to come into my room whilst I was asleep and have sex with me every night by my occasional smile and that I deserved exactly what I got. I am an alcoholic. I always needed a drink or ten to keep my voices at bay but no matter how much I drink this one voice would not stop, "you do not have to live with this," so this one night I decided and put the barrel of the gun in my mouth and the phone rang and it was Soledad calling me with a reason to live.

Sophia