When I was sick, I had a dream, or what I thought was a dream. I dreamt about Derek on the beach, and it felt so real. It felt like it wasn't a dream. It felt like he's here, like he's been with me this whole time. Like he might be with me now, and today I'm doing this groundbreaking surgery, and it's exactly the type of thing that he would love to do. And in the past, that would've made me sad, but somehow I think he might just be here, hovering over me, watching the whole thing soaking it all in, and that makes me happy.

Mer