Gossip Girl Round Table: "The Handmaiden's Tale"
Welcome to the second Gossip Girl Round Table.
While fans of the show gather in the Joey Tribbiani quotes, when the Friends character was asked if he'd prefer the cute girl from the Xerox shop or a tub of jam: Put your hands together!
LovelyLively: Like the classic Summer-Anna debate from Season One of The OC, this Gossip Girl question for the ages requires a mere six-word answer: Serena is hot. Vanessa is not.
GossipGuy: Simply answered: Serena.
Will Blair and Nate ever have sex?
LovelyLively: No, at least not for a while. Blair's as sexy as they come, but she also likes to string guys along, if you know what I mean. I mean she's a damn tease, like Britney Spears, circa 1999. Blair knows what she's after, that everyone wants her. Just pray Blair doesn't get married twice, crank out two kids and start flashing her crotch constantly by age 25.
GossipGuy: Not at this rate. Nate, you need to stop professing your love and desire to masked women that may or may not be Serena. And really... telling her not to talk?
DANdy: No. Nate isn't being fair to Blair and she'll eventually dump his boring ass (and beautiful eyes). And we know who will be there to pick up the pieces, i.e. give Blair her first horizontal mambo lesson, right? Chuck.
Smoother Gossip Girl quote of the night: "You look ravishing. If I were your man, I wouldn't need clues to find you." (Chuck to Blair), or "I thought he should know how it feels to lose you. Cause, trust me, it's not fun." (Rufus to Lily)
GossipGuy: I'm going to have to give this one to Chuck. That man may be a creep, but he's one smooth creep.
DANdy: Rufus is on the rebound. I didn't feel the sincerity behind his words. But Chuck? He may be a dirt bag, but he can recognize hotness when he sees it. And that's all he's relaying to Blair here.
LovelyLively: I wouldn't need clues to find you? Are you kidding? Unless you're playing the board game Clue, that's just stupid. Rufus gets full marks, however, for masking the blatant cheese factor of that quote with great timing and just enough sincerity.
Are Chuck and Jenny now even?
DANdy: Not by a long shot. Chuck probably enjoys being in his underwear. Jenny didn't enjoy almost being violated.
LovelyLively: Chuck could be the bigger person and look at it that way, but it's like I always tell people, "If you get locked outside in your underwear, never let it slide." Little J will get hers and then some, mark my words.
GossipGuy: I think it's going to take a few more practical jokes from Jenny for it to be truly even. I mean, Chuck did try to violate her. I Jenny needs to tie his underwear to the flagpole to even things out so this couple can get together and live happily ever after.