How I Met Your Mother Season 1 Quotes

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We've compiled a collection of the most complete How I Met Your Mother season one quotes for your enjoyment.  A lot happened to our favorite group of friends during the first season and there's no funnier way to relive it than through the quotes.  Here's some of our favorites:

Ted: Look, this woman could actually be my future wife. I want our first kiss to be amazing.
Lily: Aw Ted, that is so sweet. So you chickened out like a little bitch? | permalink
Barney: It's going to be legen...wait for it...and I hope you're not lactose-intolerant cause the second half of that word is...dairy! | permalink
Robin: You are gonna love Kelly, she's fun, she's smart, she lives in the moment..
Barney: Translation: She's ugly, she's ugly, she ugs in the ugly.
Robin: Oh, and she's totally hot! | permalink
Robin: Am I just wired wrong?
Ted: No. You dumped me, so obviously you have abysmal taste in men | permalink
How I Met Your Mother Cast Image
Marshall: I stabbed Lily, I stabbed my fiancee.
Ted: Come on Marshall, do you really think she's still your fiancee? | permalink
Barney: We couldn't go back for Natalya, a human being, but we do have time for hot dogs?
Marshall: Yeah, we like hot dogs | permalink
[Barney is stripping down...]
Robin: What the hell are you doing?
Barney: I'm birthday suiting up! | permalink
Lily: So if those guys pressure you to smoke, what do you say?
Marshall: Only when I'm drunk.
Lily: Good boy | permalink

Now go suit up and read the rest of our How I Met Your Mother quotes and vote for your favorites!

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Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.


HIMYM Quotes

You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever.


Whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless your friends are there to see it.