90210 Review: The Pretenders

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Is it me or do Naomi Clark parties not have the same cache that they used to?

In "The Sea Change" Naomi raced to do some damage control for her and Max's shotgun wedding...you know, the one that happened after he ditched cosmetics heiress Madison at the altar?

I find it hard to believe that Max and Alec's company doesn't have their own press person who would be handling things, but this is 90210 so we can suspend reality a little bit; especially when the latest episode lent itself to some seriously soapy bits.

Kiss for the Hubby

As much as Alec hates Naomi, she might be exactly what Max and his company need! Honestly, I understand being a protective and loyal friend, but Alec is almost a little too obsessed with Max. Maybe no one else sees it, but I still get a weird vibe off of him.

Perhaps I'm overreacting, but it seemed super convenient that he had to ship Max off to Japan right away to work with a couple of smart slackers on their video game empire. All those two dudes wanted to do was party. Considering the deal was sealed when Max's wife showed them a good time at a rager, I'd venture to say that they'd be okay with pushing things back a week. Besides, we could always hire Navid's hookers to entertain them?

They're not hookers, they're adult film stars! | permalink

Well, Navid, I'm sure they are lovely girls but they still get paid for sex. I say potato, you say pa-ta-to. Navid didn't seem all that torn up about Silver's decision. Maybe he's ready to sow his oats and go through his player stage. Liam, on the other hand, knows what he wants and would rather spend time in jail than fake it.

Speaking of faking it, Vanessa's spill over the balcony was laughable. If that's not one of the fakest deaths I've ever seen on television, I'd be shocked. Liam is a little adorably naive at times, kinda like Nate Archibald, so I'm gonna lay this one out for him. Vanessa did not just drop to her death and wash away in the ocean.

She is alive, probably badly injured, but totally alive. She will pop up at a really inconvenient time, maybe when Silver and Liam decide to get back together. When Vanessa does reappear, she will probably be pregnant from that hot hate sex they had before heading to Malibu. I'd be willing to place a bet on this outcome and no I'm not privy to ANY 90210 spoilers.

Of course, by this time Silver will probably be pregnant creating a beautiful baby with Teddy. I kinda thought they were gonna get drunk and get down for a minute, but I'm happy to see that the writers didn't muck that up. That would really be faking it and we've had enough pretending for one episode.

Aside from Vanessa's fake death and Alec pretending to make nice with Naomi, we had Ade trying to forget her dalliance with that hottie Taylor. Unfortunately, Dixon thinks Adrianna is being weird because of him and it's making him feel worse and insecure, which is really the last thing he needs right now. I love the Wilson siblings and Dixon just survived a near death experience, so it's only normal he's on a roller coaster of emotions. 

The trouble with the whole guy gets spinal cord injury and deals with unfaithful girlfriend storyline is that it's been done before and it's been done really well. I will admit I am unfairly biased when it comes to my proclamation of Friday Night Lights as one of the greatest shows ever, so I will just leave you with this. This new Taylor guy, who "can't unfeel" his emotions for Adrianna, is not Tim Riggins. There will never be another Tim Riggins, so let's just stop trying to make this love triangle happen right now. 

I adore Dixon, I want to see him happy as I want to see all of these characters happy, except Vanessa of course. What do you all think it'll take to stop faking that everything is okay and get our Beverly Hills crew to a great place? What did you think of this episode? Hit the comments! 

Review

Editor Rating: 3.5 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.7 / 5.0 (60 Votes)
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90210 Season 5 Episode 2 Quotes

If I could survive getting hit by a semi truck, I think I can handle a kiss.

Dixon [to Adrianna]

Max it's our honeymoon, I'm not planning on wearing that much clothing.

Naomi

90210 Season 5 Episode 2 Music

  Song Artist
The walk 1 The Walk Mayer Hawthorne iTunes
Havana brown we run the night We Run The Night Havana Brown iTunes
Ivy levan i dont wanna wake up I Don't Wanna Wake Up Ivy Levan iTunes