Fridays 9:00 PM on CBS
Hawaii-five-0

Hawaii Five-0 Review: A Very Cold March

by at . Comments

"Kanalua:" Doubt.

Know that I don’t say this lightly: This was one of the worst episodes of Hawaii Five-0 I have ever watched. After last week’s stellar Season 3 opening I’m absolutely appalled at how this episode went down.

I'll explain why...

August March: After waiting months for the return of Ed Asner as August March, I’m most disgusted with how his departure was designed. This is a man who has always thought two steps ahead of two generations of cops. Yet he decides to punch his own ticket by stepping into traffic. Seriously?!? Why were there not cops escorting him? Why was he allowed to just step out of the car on the passenger side and stroll across the grass into the path of a truck? Come on!

Catherine Getting Info: I’m all for Catherine using her feminine charms to get stuff from guys, that’s to be expected from the hotness that is Michelle Borth. But what self-respecting Naval Officer is going to hack into the WITSEC computer database by stealing the password from some poor schmuck in a bar?

Catherine Helps McGarrett

Ridiculous Computer Security: Speaking of getting info from some poor schmuck at a bar. First, the Government requires numbers, letters and a special character in all of their passwords. Second, I can tell you that none of my passwords have anything do with my childhood pet, family street or anything to do with me growing up. So between those two things, you are not going to hack a government database by asking a guy his life story over pool and randomly plugin random words he said.  

Muddled Case: From the art theft, to the suspect dying, to the getaway driver being murdered, to it all leading to a kidnapping... it was just too much. I wasn't attached to the art, or the car driver, and only cared about the girl because she was a kid. Hell, I never even figured out what August went to ask the fence for since he was the one who shot the brothers with the same gun he used last time. Add to that mix Chin Ho dealing with Malia’s death and Catherine stealing government passwords, and it becomes one giant pile of what I like to call "A Hot Mess."

Speaking of Chin Ho, the only decent part of this episode was Chin-Ho’s dealing with Malia’s death. The funeral was beautiful, and then he and Danny talking at the end was a great moment. I was glad to see Danny step-up and be a friend and family for Chin-Ho; if anyone knows how alone he might feel it would be Danny. 

But in the end, one good portion of an episode can not offset all the bad. Oh, and don’t even get me started on Kamekona new "venture" or the  lift and thrust ratios of the average touring helicopter – we will be here for days! GAH!

Here is hoping that next week we get back to a decent story plot and we get more information on Doris still being on the island. For now, I’m going to see if I can find some brain bleach to wash this episode from my mind. 

Review

Editor Rating: 2.9 / 5.0
  • 2.9 / 5.0
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
User Rating:

Rating: 3.9 / 5.0 (148 Votes)

Jim G. is a TV Fanatic Staff Writer. Follow him on Twitter.

Tags: ,
Like Us On Facebook

Want more Hawaii Five-0?

Sign up for our daily newsletter and receive the latest tv news delivered to your inbox for free!

More From TV Fanatic

Dance-moms-season-4-picture

Dance Moms Review: Two Teams, Twice the Drama

It's select ensemble vs. elite in a dance rematch this week on Dance Moms. Who came home with the victory? Read on to find out!
Exiled-opposition

Tyrant Review: Lion and the Lion Tamer

On tonight's Tyrant, Jamal and the Sheik meet for negotiations. Will they come to an agreement?
Caroles-great-ass

The Real Housewives of New York City Review: Delusional Divas

It's time to reunite on The Real Housewives of New York City. Read all about this special episode now.
Annie-gets-an-invite

Covert Affairs Review: To Trust or Not

Who can be trusted? On tonight's Covert Affairs, it's clear that it's important to trust others, but also a huge gamble.

Avatar

@Zia.....Thank you, you just made my day.

Avatar

This H50 is not the same as the old one, and it does not claim to be, nor should it be. It does pay dues to the old show, but its not the same. The old show would not do well today. It does not matter what this show does, someone is not going to be happy. We want character stuff, we want procedural stuff, we want Catherine, we don't want Catherine, we want originality, we want reality, Danny's funny, Danny's annoying,...... I think this is a good show, can there be improvements, of course. If I did not like it, I would not watch. If a show annoys so much, then why watch it?
Entertainment is a break from the stress of the world that we all experience, why can't we just keep a TV show in perspective. There are other things to do.

Avatar

I totally agree with Jim. This show is commercial, not artistic. A famous Hawaiian story is being changed dramatically with "hot" and shirtless scenes. It is ridiculous that the producer and casts said that the show will spread Hawaian cultural beauty arounnd the world with such scenes. The original show gained its success at that time. Is there no other stories about current Hawaiian life?

Jimg

I appreciate the different opinions on the episode. I know I don't have the most popular view on the show,

Avatar

I agree. Hot mess. I am predicting horrible ratings. People want escapism but with some brains. A master criminal is allowed to run around on the freeway by himself? Huh? What?
So many saying it made sense he didn't want to go to prison but nobody is arguing that the op is saying that being left alone to run and play in heavy traffic is lame. I myself saw this as soon as as he got out of the police car.... Oh not even in handcuffs either so lame. Show is dying.

Avatar

Well,I think season 3 is great,and I don't understand why the ratings are so terrible. Oh,maybe because I am a huge fan of this show and the foursome team,I love the show in any way. But I'm still worried about the ratings,I hope H50 could survive cancellation. So there's a little question bothering me,who exactly Catherine is,I mean what kind of role she plays in McGarrett's life?Girlfriend,lover or friend with benefit? Have they said 'I love you' to each other?Did McGarrett introduce her as his 'girlfriend' to his friends or families? Everytime Catherine shows up we can predict that McGarrett's gonna need her help,is that what a girlfriend for? Compared with Danny's situation,McGarrett always takes care of Danny's problems instead of asking for favors. So I'm kinda confused,what's the point of making Catherine a regular character? Sorry for my horrible English!

Avatar

Frist of all, I totally agree with VickiSue, this episode was fabulous and she's right it's only going to get better. The shot with March getting hit by a truck, I thought was brilliant, he didn't want to spend any time in prison and this was HIS way out, and he was 2 steps ahead of everyone, knowing this was what he was going to do when everyone was looking towards where he pointed, then SPLAT.
When I spoke with Peter Lenkov the night before SOTB, he said that this Season is so much better than the last one. I personally thought both the last 2 Seasons were incredible.
Who doesn't love the action/drama/adventure/scenery(not including Alex O'Loughlin and Daniel Dae Kim, which adds another dimension to the whole show). Come on people this is filmed on location in Oahu, Hawaii. To be able to see this show with all of the above every week, well it really brightens up my outlook, just waiting for Monday nights.

Avatar

Jim you were way to harsh in your review!! There were cops all around when March got out and he pointed them toward "the girl" it only takes a second to step into traffic, I found it another wow didn't see that coming like his last episode and Steve and Danno had it right he died on HIS terms!! Cath is always risking her career to help Steve and this whole Doris thing he needs help, she is way to cunning. I think we are not supposed to like her if she came back after 20 years and all was right with the world you would complain. The Malia moments were very moving as they should have been. Yes Kamakona as a tourist pilot is ridiculous that's what makes it fun and they said as much to him. Lighten up Jim this is the best show in that time slot to me and it only gets better in my eyes!!

Avatar

There were things to like and dislike about this episode. The funeral scene was so beautiful. I found the crime story confusing, but given August March's wiliness, I thought he would have led them on a merrier chase. I wouldn't have wanted March in a third episode of course, but the suicide thing was weird.
Who was the man Catherine was playing pool with, and what did her computer research have to do with what she told Steve at the end? Was the guy with WitSec?
But the absolute best thing for me, as a dedicated Alex O'Loughlin fan, was how good he looked and sounded, compared to when he was at his unhealthiest last season. He was articulate, animated, and looked absolutely fabulous.
Go Alex !!!

Mrs-cleaver

@Chris1215tine - No you were not alone lol!!