Steve: Just relax, alright and enjoy the view.
Danny: What view? Like I said, jet stream, no view.

I see what he's doing there. He's doing Jack Nicholson. And it's very appropriate too, because the last six years of my life has been sort of like "The Shining." Which is a film if you'd seen, you'd know, spends the whole movie torturing a young boy named Danny.

Danny

Like I always said, only three things are sure in life. Death, taxes and Clay Maxwell ordering Giordano's on a Thursday night.

Grover

Clay: You know you are going to go to jail for this.
Grover: Yeah, it would be me and you. I get dibs on the bottom bunk.

Jerry: The concept was genius, but the operation was an epic fail.
Chin: Only because it sounds like a plan concocted by Wylie Coyote.

Russo: Hey, check this out.
Steve: What was inside?
Russo: Cyanide
Steve: Cyanide?
Russo: I know, crazy right? The secret bunker, the World War II pistol, the kill pill, and the ring with the in compartment, this is some real secret agent stuff.

Chin: You look like you just saw a ghost.
Steve: Rough commute.

Steve: Well, the morning's yours Aunt Deb, what do you want to do?
Aunt Deb: What do I want to do? I want to drive your truck.
Steve: What?
Aunt Deb: Your pickup truck, I want to take that bad boy for a spin.

Kono: Do you think they're...um
Grover: Knockin' em? Oh yeah

Steve: This is great for us.
Danny: I hate you.

Karen: Really, I don't because they're not a couple.
Karen's husband: So what Karen, they're stuck in a relationship they can't get out of, they fight all the time, and they don't have sex. Sounds a lot like our marriage to me.

Danny: Say, what is this Lorraine?
Lorraine: Oh that is an itinerary for the subjects we will be covering this week.
Danny: Because it says, "Overcoming your sexual incompatibility." Did you sign us up for couples therapy?
Steve: Whoops!

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Hawaii Five-0 Quotes

Research is my super power.

Jerry

McGarrett: I'll be back.
Danno: I'll be back? That's all you could come up with is, I'll be back? Trust me he's done better.