Pretty Little Liars Review: No Place Like Home

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I don't have to hide, you do. And you're gonna wish you stayed dead.

Mona [to Ali]

Wow. There's nothing more welcoming to come home to after two years on the lam than a psycho girl telling you that you'd wish you kept playing dead.

Pretty Little Liars Season 5 Episode 2 proved that sometimes you really can't go home after all.

Ali really had no hope of coming home to a normal life. After all, it was her own mother who tried to bury her alive. Her list of enemies is far long than her list of friends. Let's face it: Ali's reign of head bitch in charge is over.

So, as Spencer said, why is everyone still living on Planet Alison?

We made a pact Emily. A is finally dead and we were all ready to get back to our lives and now we're on Planet Alison.

Spencer

It's hard to ever believe anyone on this show is really trustworthy, but Holbrook seems pretty legit. I want to say that they should have told him the truth, I really do. But how can we be sure that would have been a good idea?

One thing I know for sure is that Ali starting a new lie was just the worst idea possible. These girls are tired, exasperated and on a short fuse with all her BS. And why shouldn't they be? They've been stalked and bullied for the last few years because of their relationship and friendship with Ali.

I realize this makes me sound like a disloyal friend and bitch, but Ali is a sociopath. Can we all just be honest about this? Even though Spencer went bitch cray in Pretty Little Liars season 4 with the Adderall addiction, I feel like she's the only one thinking clearly right now.

Also, Spoby sex. Just had to mention that.

Now back to Spence: The messed up part is that next to Aria (who accidentally murdered Shana in Pretty Little Liars Season 5 Episode 1) Spencer probably has the most drama on the horizon. Melissa was never in London and is 100% hiding some nasty secret of her own.

Next to the DiLaurentis family, the Hastings clan is the shadiest family in Rosewood. Speaking of that family, Spencer's and Ali's shared brother Jason was exceptionally moody and creepy this episode. And hot. (Sorry, but he did look hot!)

He was definitely in NY. He was also most likely one of the A's running around in that park. Was he in cahoots with Jessica? I'm not entirely sure based on his face when Jessica's body was found. Then again, the DiLaurentis children know how to fake emotion really, really well.

So is Jason really dangerous? Hanna and Emily were pretty spooked!

Emily: Follow him!
Hanna: No you follow him! I have to change my underwear!

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Pretty Little Liars Season 5 Episode 2 Quotes

We made a pact Emily. A is finally dead and we were all ready to get back to our lives and now we're on Planet Alison.

Spencer

Emily: What happened with Shanna-
Aria: Happened because of me, and I can handle that part...I think.