Popular Quotes
Ron: Haircuts, there are three acceptable haircuts: High and tight, crew cut, buzz cut. Are the scissors broken in your house, son?
Kanan: Seem like you and Juke really connecting.
Marvin: Kiss my ass, Kanan.
Ed: We need to renew our vows.
Madeline: What?
Ed: This time committing to live up to them. Do you think you can do that?
Madeline: With all my heart.
Ed: Truly informed as to what we're getting into.
Madeline: Truly, truly, yes. Committing to better or worse.
Ed: No, no. Your worst is off the table.
Madeline: Yes. Absolutely. Do you really mean it?
Ed: But this is not a put a pretty ribbon on it bygones be bygones ending. OK? This is a shot at a new beginning. Which if you really feel that you're up to it...
Madeline: I am. I am.
Ed: Well, then so am I.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Jim: [on his cell phone] Dunder Mifflin, this is Jim!
Cable boy. Cable boy. What have you done to my little cable boy?
Kramer
Vince: He got a girl.
Eric: Really, who?
Turtle: I don't know, he must have ordered in late night. Woke me up at like 4:30. Sounded like a couple of baboons fucking.
I couldn't hear you over the sound of this gigantic freakin' tank!
Cyril
Welcome to Cougar Town - Season Five? Didn't see that coming.
Title Card
[whispering] I couldn't get pregnant.
Elizabeth
Mike: Here. Wear this.
Josh: What is this?
Mike: Robert Graham contrasting tops. You will crush gash!
Josh: What an awful...! Every gash is somebody's daughter!
I don't want to be one of the bodies. It's that simple.
Theo
One thing you can always count on, Buy More laziness.
Morgan