Popular Quotes
Sue: To you the glass is always half empty!
Charlie: Right now my wife is half full or Rick Springfield.
Andrew, we're bad for each other. We both know that.
Sam
I have eleven hours with her in a confined space. Unless she's willing to jump off a moving train and tuck and roll down the side of a hill, she will eventually succumb to the acquired taste that is Howard Wolowitz
Wolowitz [about Summer Glau]
Isaiah: You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re just talking shit about me just like everybody else.
Micah: That’s what you think about me? The only one who defends you when the frat makes fun of you for being gay.
Isaiah: But I never said what I was. I don’t have to. My sexuality doesn’t need defending, Micah. You are not a superhero. I don’t know what you are right now.
I was there the first time you played stickball with [Danny's] guts.
Jay [to Lexi]
Chris: Dad, what's the blowhole for?
Peter: I'll tell you what it's NOT for son, and then you'll understand why I can never go back to Seaworld
He is an intelligent psychopath. He is a sadist. He will never kill like this again. So how do we catch him?
Will
You don't want to prank the Omega Chis? It's like bizarro Cappie!
Beaver
Kitty: You are young and you are beautiful.
Rebecca: Are you drunk?
Joy: I think this is a lot to take.
Abigail: Welcome to being a Merriwick.
Annie: Check your phone!
Beth: I just did.
Annie: Did you check Facebook?
Beth: Cuz a hitman's gonna friend request me?
Annie: Oh, like you're so versed in how they communicate.
"I was upset. When I’m upset I like to nest."
IZZIE