Dan Humphrey Quotes
Jane: Did you already tell him we got Sorkin to write movie?
Dan: What? No. That's incredible.
Jane: I know. Now your character will talk even faster than you do.
Dan: But how can I guarantee that she's not just going to screw it up?
Serena: Because I won't let her. She may not know this world, but I do. And I will protect your story and you.
Gossip Girl: Careful, S.
Dan: I have your word?
Serena: You have my word.
Gossip Girl: Everybody knows the road to hell is paved with good intentions. And shady bosses.
Dan: Whatever Jane sent you here to say, why don't you just say it.
Serena: Well we both think that you should waive your right to write the script.
Dan: Why would I do that?
Serena: Because if you write it your project will be stuck in development hell.
Jane: We'd love if you could open up the world of the Upper East Side a little bit more.
Natalie: Rich people are so hard to like. Maybe you could add someone more relatable.
Dan: I thought I did that already.
Serena: I think Dan is referring to his main character, Dylan Hunter. He'll appeal to everyone. He starts off as an innocent from Brooklyn.
Jane: Who quotes Hawthorne and screens Fellini films? I don't think so.
Serena: So Mr. Screenwriter, are you ready for your first development meeting?
Dan: I think so. As long as you guys don't want to change the ending. Or the beginning. Or all the stuff in the middle.
Dan: Number nine. Inside by Daniel Humphrey. What did Lincoln Hawk's first single debut at?
Rufus: Eight.
Dan: Without you inspiring me from the beginning I wouldn't have been able to write anything, so I owe you one. And despite the events of the day, you know, I trust you. I do have one condition: I want to write the screenplay.
Serena: I finally finished the book.
Dan: I told you, it's not you. Yes, there are parts of you. And Daisy Buchanan. And Amy March. And Gwyneth Paltrow. Five different roles she's played. But it's a novel. It's inspired by a lot of things. It isn't speaking to some deeper truth.
Serena: Are you sure? Because I know this may sound crazy or selfish or... like I'm living in the past or something. But you were the love of my life, Dan. I don't know, I just thought I was yours too.
Serena: I followed Jane all the way done to her town car apologizing, and even then I don't think it was enough. Thank you for waiting.
Dan: I didn't want to. You scared away everyone, and now no one wants the book.
Serena: Dan—
Dan: Your apology this morning was just strategic, wasn't it?
Serena: Yeah. Pretty much.
Alessandra: Public television is the last bastion of the intellectual. If this goes well, Charlie Rose could be next.
Dan: Oh, that's a good tactic. Piling on the pressure right before your already-prone-to-nervous-rambling client goes on live television for the first time.
Serena: I may have overreacted about how you portrayed me in the book.
Dan: Thank you so much. You know I have to admit it's been kind of hard. My dad and Nate and Blair still won't talk to me.
Serena: Well things are looking up then. One down, three to go.
Dan: Never thought you'd be the first.
Serena: I am full of surprises. You know that.
Chuck: Humphrey, I'm feeling like my old self again.
Dan: Me too. Although not in a good way. I really thought the days of everyone turning their backs on me were over.
Chuck: Well, at last this time it's because they hate you and not because they don't know you exist. Be patient. Soon your literary misdeeds will be forgotten.
