Hermes: Jumpin' is for suckers. Oh ho, I'm good. Who wants a piece of me?
Zoidberg: I'll try a bite!

Amy: Finally, a uniform I'd be happy to be caught dead in!
Zoidberg: And boy does it wick away moisture! Gallons and gallons of it!

Ladies love a decapod with clothes made of cash!

Uh, God, it's Zoidberg. I hate to bother you, but [large bag of money lands in front of him] - alright, alright, I'll shut up!

Zoidberg: Ah yes, better. A lonely weekend in my dumpster with a jar of pennies and tears.
Amy: Sounds good. See you Monday!

Amy: Um, Zoidberg, maybe Vegas isn't the best place for people like you.
Zoidberg: What? It's full of fat guys in sandals.

Look out, penny slots, I've got a system! It's to put all my money in you! Hahahahaha!

Zoidberg: I'm Dr. Zoidberg I'm very important.
Leela: Hey Zoidberg you forgot to empty this trash can!

Bender: Life is about decisions. Make the wrong ones and you'll wind up face down in a pool of your own blood and urine.
Zoidberg: Still, to have your own pool!

Zoidberg: Welcome back old friend, I missed you terribly!
Hermes: You do everything terribly! And I'm not your friend!
Zoidberg: Hahahaha! Good old Hermes! When he stops insulting, that's when I worry!

Zoidberg: You don't understand, he was the only one who cared enough to insult me! I'll never see Hermes again!
Hermes: On the bright side, I'll never see Zoidberg again.

Hermes: People, as company bureaucrat, I will today be performing the annual performance review - with a twist!
Fry: Oh no, the firing tie!
Hermes: Correct. I will be evaluating each of you, and the lowest-rated employee - possibly Zoidberg - will be fired at sundown. Zoidberg.
Zoidberg: Hohohohoho. Classic Hermes.

Futurama Quotes

Singer: Call Robo-Rooter when you flush your towel.
Plumber-bot: And we can also help with an impacted bowel!

Little: Hello and welcome to a remarkable championship bout. Destructor, a robotic armoured tank, whose very use at battle has been ruled a war crime, versus Gender Bender, who wears a pink tutu. This is Rich Little, imitating Howard Cosell, here at ringside with George Foreman. George, a word in edgewise?
Foreman: This could be the most one-sided fight since 1973 when Ali faced an 80-foot tall mechanical Joe Frazier. M-My memory's not what it used to be but I think the entire Earth was destroyed.
Little: Interesting, if true. The Vegas odds tonight stand at an unprecedented 1000-0; a bet of $0 on Bender pays $1000 if he wins. Still, very few takers.
Foreman: It's not-not a smart bet.