Jeff Winger Quotes
Senor Chang: Pickled bull testicle?
Jeff: Are you offering or collecting?
What makes you think I can make Senor Chang do anything if I can't convince you guys not to make me do it?
In a way all of you are right. Okay, what was I tuning out?
Annie: What's wrong?
Jeff: There's this weird pain right above my eyebrow.
Annie: It's called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was four.
Dean: What's it gonna take? A plum park space, free meals, a night of companionship, if you know what I mean?
Jeff: I'll do it for the parking space and if you promise not to tell mean what you mean
Pierce [to Britta]: Have you thought about hypnotherapy? I know a great hypno therapist
Jeff [to Britta]: Ten to one says it's him
Abed: Sometimes I like to pour hot chocolate mix into cold milk and drink it with hot cocoa, I call it special drink
Jeff: And some day you will know it by its true name, diabetes
Jeff: Every piece of that condo is a piece of my life
Britta: Is that a bidet?
Jeff: That part is for resale value and Saturday afternoons
The next person that offers me pity will be mentioned by name in my suicide note
Abed: Jeff, did I say anything in my sleep last night about farm animals or Brian Williams?
Jeff: ...I don't think so.
Abed: Cool. Cool, cool, cool. [edit]
TV's the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk. TV never forgot me at the zoo. TV never abused and insulted me... unless you count Cop Rock
Britta: Are you okay? It looks like you have actual bedhead this morning.
Jeff: In fashion, I'm what's known as a taste-maker.
Britta: And you missed an entire side of your face shaving.
Jeff: And next month, so will Gwen Stefani
