Joey Tribbiani Quotes
If you go with Bonnie you're doing the smart, sensible thing and moving on, and, if you go with Rachel, does that mean Bonnie's free tonight?
- Permalink: If you go with Bonnie you're doing the smart, sensible thing and...
Rachel: (About Bonnie) Is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?
Joey: Yeah, sure. Well, you know, earlier she was talking about geography.
Monica: Joey, she was listing the countries she's done it in.
Joey: Well, I think we all learned something.
- Permalink: Is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex? ...
Joey: But you'd go out with me, right?
Monica: No! It is the same as with Chandler. We're friends.
Joey: Well, let's say we're the last two guys on the planet and you had a gun to your head. Which one would you pick?
Monica: Which one of you has the gun to my head?
- Permalink: But you'd go out with me, right? No! It is the same as with Ch...
Joey: (To Bonnie) We're playing strip Happy Days game!
Bonnie: Cool! I'll catch up! (Takes off her sweater)
- Permalink: We're playing strip Happy Days game! Cool! I'll catch up!
Ross: (About Joey's finger in his mouth) What is that taste?
Joey: What? My hands are totally clean, I just gave the duck a bath.
- Permalink: What is that taste? What? My hands are totally clean, I just g...
Ross: All right, so Chandler, from now on, don't give your boss a chance to get you. You know, just, don't turn your back to him.
Joey: Yeah, or, you could teach him a lesson, you know? What you could do is you could rub something that smells really bad on your butt, right? Then, when he goes to smack you, his hand will smell. Now, what could you rub on your butt that would smell bad?
Chandler: What if Joey was president?
- Permalink: All right, so Chandler, from now on, don't give your boss a chan...
Joey: Hey, wouldn't it be cool if our duck and our chick had a little baby? We could call it Chuck.
Chandler: Or Dick.
- Permalink: Hey, wouldn't it be cool if our duck and our chick had a little ...
Rachel: What, Pheebs?! Two dates in one day? That's so unlike you.
Phoebe: I know, I know! I'm like playing the field. Ya know? Like, juggling two guys, I'm sowing my wild oats. Ya know? Ya know, this kind of like, ya know, oat-sowing, field-playing juggler.
Joey: So Pheebs, do they know about each other?
Phoebe: Does a dog's lips move when he reads?
- Permalink: What, Pheebs?! Two dates in one day? That's so unlike you. I k...
Monica: Pete's breaking up with me.
Monica: I just checked my messages, and he said that when he gets back from Atlanta, we need to talk.
Monica: Well, that's it. People never say "We need to talk" unless it's something bad.
Joey: Whoa, that doesn't necessarily mean that he's breaking up with you.
Joey: Yeah, maybe he just cheated on you.
- Permalink: Pete's breaking up with me. What?! I just checked my message...