Liz: Lutz what are you working on?
Lutz: Breathing through my mouth so I don't smell the throw up on my shirt.

You know, my Johnny's single, and he gives excellent back rubs, I assure you.

Lutz's mom

Why don't we trick him into kissing me? It would be so funny because I'm not gay.

Were any of the firemen strong? Were any of them the ones from the calendar?

I've worked here for three years. I gave you that car I won?

Yeah, also my girlfriend is mad... in Canada!

Help mommy's baby.

Frank: My god, He's mortal!
Lutz: What just happened!?

Please don't make me move back to Alaska, Liz. I hate it there.

Frank: Yo Tray, we got a problem.
Tracy: [as Jefferson] Pray who be this Tracy Jordan thou speakest of?
Frank: Uh, President Jefferson, we got a problem.
Tracy: Speakest!
Frank: That horse ate your wig.
Tracy: Well, stand guard by his rump and await it in his droppings!
Lutz: Or we could probably just go get a new wig?
Tracy: A-ha! I like you, young man; you shall run my university.

30 Rock Quotes

Jack: Never go with a hippie to a second location.
Liz: I need to do that thing that rich people do where they turn money into more money. Can you teach me how to do that?
Jack: With my eyes closed.

Hey, nerds! Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? [pointing thumbs at self] This moi.

Liz