Liz: Lutz what are you working on?
Lutz: Breathing through my mouth so I don't smell the throw up on my shirt.

You know, my Johnny's single, and he gives excellent back rubs, I assure you.

Lutz's mom

Why don't we trick him into kissing me? It would be so funny because I'm not gay.

Were any of the firemen strong? Were any of them the ones from the calendar?

I've worked here for three years. I gave you that car I won?

Yeah, also my girlfriend is mad... in Canada!

Help mommy's baby.

Frank: My god, He's mortal!
Lutz: What just happened!?

Please don't make me move back to Alaska, Liz. I hate it there.

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