Favorite Michael Bluth Quotes
Buster: (about Lucille 2) And her nausea's gotten really bad, too. It's really been difficult on us. It's definitely taking its toll.
Michael: Well, you know, you're free to go, pal. It's not like you made a commitment to this woman.
Buster: Well, I didn't make a commitment ... I did refer to it as our nausea. But you know, that's when we were going at it really hot and heavy.
Michael: Well, now it's my nausea.
She sometimes takes a little pack of mayonnaise and she'll squirt it in her mouth all over. And then she'll take an egg and kind of...mmmm! She calls it a 'mayon-egg.' Are you okay?
George Michael
George Sr.: You're pimping out your sister?
Michael: Well you were pimping out my mother!
Lucille: She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the jokes on her because she doesn't know how little I care for Gob.
Michael: I think that makes the joke on Gob.
Oscar: The question is, which way do I try to get it in her?
Michael: I don't need any details.
Oscar: Maybe, I'll put it in her brownie.
Michael: Hey!
George Sr.: Don't get involved. Believe me, when I thought your first wife was driving us apart, I did not make a stink.
Michael: You complained all the time, and she was my only wife. And she died.
George Sr.: Yeah, well. See, things have a way of working themselves out.
Lindsay: Is that a shot at me?
Gob: Probably.
Lindsay: Because, for your information, I have a job.
Michael: Really? What kind of job?
Lindsay: Beads!
Gob: Bees?!
Lindsay: Beads.
Gob: Beads?!
Michael: Gob's not on board.
Michael: You were flying today, buddy.
Buster: Yes, I was flying. But a little too close to the sun.
Lucille: You let him go in the sun? (To Buster) Get in the back seat. I'll be right out.
Buster: Front seat, mom. I sit in the front seat now.
George Sr.: I never see you anymore, Michael.
Michael: You're in prison. And I was here yesterday.
George Sr. : Oh, yeah, that's... That's... I'm sorry. I couldn't break away from the poker game. Capital-G was down to his boxers.
Michael: Strip poker?
George Sr.: Yeah, and it's tough. We can really only play about... Two hands.
Michael: You mean you taught me a lesson not to teach lessons?
George Sr.: It was my last lesson.
Barry: Well, if he's got a shot with her, just give me a little tap on the fanny.
Michael: It's not going to happen.
Lucille: I've done everything I can. I even tried to convince them he's [Buster] gay, but no one would believe that a woman like me would have a gay son.
Michael: Well you certainly tried. You guys wore matching outfits until he was twelve.
