Popular Richard Gilmore Quotes
(On the phone) Oh this is getting ridiculous, Aaron. I will not continue to have these conversations with a child. Yes, he is a child! Well when he's worked thirty years for the company, that's when he's not a child and until then, I don't care what his opinions are. Aaron are you listening to me?! Good, because I'm hanging up on you now and I wanted to make sure that you heard it! What a moron!
Emily: Well I just don't understand why you waited so late to call! Are you sure? Fine! Alright, yes! Goodbye (hangs up the phone).
Richard: What's the problem, Emily?
Emily: The problem is, that apparently Florence could not get here because of the storm.
Richard: Florence?
Emily: Our cook.
Richard: Ah. Well, we'll just have to go out then.
Emily: Please, Richard pay attention. We can't go out, it's miserable out there.
Richard: Well we'll figure something out dear.
Emily: What?! What will we figure out? I hate the damn snow!
Richard: Emily, calm down.
Emily: This is a serious problem. These Friday night dinners are the only proper food that child eats all week.
Richard: (Calls out to Rory who's sitting in the dining room) Rory? Are you in any way malnurished or in need of some international relief organization to recrute a celebrity to raise money on your account?
Rory: I'm good.
Richard: She's good, Emily.
Emily: Your sense of humor rears its ugly head at the oddest of times, Richard.
Richard: I'm not the mastermind behind some great scheme to spoil your dinner plans and I don't care to be treated as such.
Emily: So you're fine with having no dinner tonight, is that it?
Richard: I certainly am not.
Rory: (enters from the dining room) How 'bout I check the fridge? I'm sure there's something in there we could whip up.
Emily: Whip up? (says it like it's a new concept)
Rory: Yeah, come on. It'll be fun, I promise.
Emily: Well come on Mr.-We'll-Figure-It-Out! (they're all standing in front of the refridgerator) Nothing!
Richard: Not a blessed thing.
Rory: There's frozen pizza!
Emily: How in the world did that get there?
Rory: Maybe you bought it and forgot about it.
Emily: I have never bought frozen pizza, it must belong to Anna.
Richard: The maid?
Emily: Yes.
Richard: Ah, got one!
Emily: (Rory pulls the pizza out) What are you doing?
Rory: I'm gonna make it.
Emily: Oh Rory, you're not serious.
Richard: That hardly looks like dinner.
Emily: I agree. Rory, that's food you eat a carnival, or in a Turkish prison.
Rory: I promise you're gonna love it.
Emily: But-
Rory: Listen. Just leave it up to me. You guys go back into the living room and I'll call you when it's ready. (Emily and Richard both give in and get ready to leave) Hey Grandma.
Emily: (she and Richard both turn around) Yes?
Rory: What are the odds of you knowing where a cookie sheet would be?
Richard: I'd say very slim (Emily gives him a death glare).
Rory: Okay, never mind. I'll find it.
Emily: (looks at Richard before they leave) Very slim? Thank you for that.
Emily: (almost in tears) Richard Gilmore, there may be many things happening in this hospital tonight, but your dying is not one of them. I did not sign on to your dying, and it is not going to happen. Not tonight, not for a very long time. In fact, I demand to go first. Do I make myself clear?
Richard: (tenderly) Yes, Emily. You may go first.
Emily: (patting Rory) This little girl likes you.
Richard: Well, she has good taste.
Richard: We always go to the Vineyard at this time of year.
Lorelai: Well, you know, you could break the chain, Dad. Go to Paris.
Rory: Yes, Paris!
Lorelai: Impressionism, poodles.
Rory: Crme brle.
Lorelai: Oh, that's great!
Richard: Impossible!
Lorelai: Pourquoi? (speaking to Rory) French.
Emily: We only go to Europe in the fall.
Lorelai: You know, Mom, I heard a rumor Europe's still there in the spring.
Rory: I heard that too.
Emily: We know that it's there in the spring but we never go in the spring because we always go in the fall.
Lorelai: It's getting a little too Lewis Carroll for me.
Richard: Well what is so interesting about Europe in the spring?
Lorelai: Spring vegetables.
Emily: You want us to go to Europe to eat a vegetable?
Lorelai: No, Mom. I don't know. There's all kinds of stuff. There's festivals and, you know, Europe.
Emily: In the fall.
Richard: It costs a fortune to travel first class in Europe. We only do it every two years.
Emily: In the fall.
Richard: It's just not in the budget this year.
Lorelai: You don't have to fly first class.
(Emily and Richard both look stunned)
Lorelai: 'Cause there's always coach.
(Richard looks even more stunned)
Lorelai: (taken aback) Or business class is slightly less. There's deals on the Internet. (Richard and Emily remain silent) Hmm. (to Rory)Pass the potatoes.
Lorelai: Rory just dressed up in a cute apron the other day, and so I was just teasing her about it.
Richard: Why did you get dressed up in an apron?
Lorelai: W..well, we decided to give up on that pesky Harvard dream and focus on something more realistic. Mom, dad, Rory's decided to become a maid, just like I was.
Emily: Is that funny? (to Richard) Did you think that was funny?
Richard: What would have possessed you to say such a thing?!
Emily: And in front of Rory?!
Lorelai: I was kidding.
Emily: God, my heart stopped!
Lorelai: (To Rory) Why don't you tell them about your bird? That seems like a safe subject.
Lorelai: (to her parents) You're both going to hell, I hope you realize that.
Richard: At least we'll be well rested.
(dinner at Emily and Richard's)
Lorelai: Mmm, kickass wine.
Emily: How poetic!
Lorelai: It's got a nice smell. Earthy, vibrant, you can taste the Italian's feet.
Richard: Well, it's a Bordeaux, it's French.
Lorelai: Ha, what's an Italian's foot doing in a French wine?
Richard: Lorelai, what are you going to take away from this? That everything that happened in the past is suddenly fine because I defended you?
Lorelai: No.
Richard: That the hell you put your mother and me through over the past 16 years is suddenly washed away? Well, it's not!
Lorelai: We've all been through hell, Dad.
Richard: I had to tell my friends, my colleagues, that my only daughter, the brightest in her class, was pregnant and leaving school.
Lorelai: That must have been devastating.
Richard: Then you ran away and treated us as lepers. Your mother couldn't get out of bed for a month! Did you know that? Did you?
Lorelai: No.
Richard: We did nothing to deserve that! Nothing to earn that!
Lorelai: All right, I get it. I'm horrible. So why don't you disown me and adopt Christopher? You love him.
Richard: Oh, don't be a martyr, Lorelai. And don't be naive. Do you think I love the boy who got my daughter pregnant? I wanted to kill him. I would have, too, with my bare hands! But there was a proper procedure to be followed in a situation like this.
Lorelai: Marriage.
Richard: Christopher was willing to follow the plan we laid out. You weren't.
Lorelai: What about what I wanted? Dad, didn't that mean anything to you?
Richard: Sometimes, one has to sacrifice something in order to do what is right.
Lorelai: (speechless) I.....I feel indescribably sad for you right now, Dad.
Richard: Well, save your emotions, Lorelai. I've had quite enough of them tonight.
Richard: This little girl is quite smart, Strobe. She could even give you a run for your money.
Strobe: Oh? (Stares at Rory, who stares at the floor) I think my money will be safe.
Lorelai: Hi, Mom.
Emily: Lorelai, my goodness, this is a surprise. Is it Easter already?
Lorelai: (sounding uncomfortable) No, I just, uh, finished up my business class and I thought I would stop by.
Emily: To see me?
Lorelai: Yes.
Emily: Well, isn't that nice. Come in.
Lorelai: Thanks.
(They walk to the living room.)
Lorelai: The place looks great.
Emily: It hasn't changed.
Lorelai: Well, there you go. How are the girls at the bridge club?
Emily: Old.
Lorelai: Well... good.
(Lorelai and Emily sit, opposite to each other)
Emily: You said you were taking a business class?
Lorelai: Yeah, mmhmm, yeah. I'm taking a business class at the college twice a week. I'm sure I told you.
Emily: Well, if you're sure then you must have. (she pauses) Would you like some tea?
Lorelai: I would love some coffee.
Richard: (calling from another room) Emily? I'm home.
Emily: We're in here.
(Richard walks into the living room)
Lorelai: Hi, Dad.
Richard: What is it, Christmas already?
