Roger: I watched the sunrise today. Couldn't sleep.
Don: How was it?
Roger: Average.

You're gonna use your dying breath to tell Don to fix this.

Anabelle: You're married, aren't you?
Roger: I am.
Anabelle: Still or again?
Roger: You know it's again. And don't get cute.

You wanna be on some people's minds. Some people, you don't.

Anabelle: You were the one.
Roger: You weren't.

Can someone please get my wife out of the kitchen? I have something very nice to say about her.

If you can make it through a day like today, marriage is a cake walk.

Roger: No one else is saying the right thing about this.
Joan: You're really upset.
Roger: What's that about?
Joan: Because there's nothing funny about this.

I wanna see what you look like with your tail between your legs.

You're not good as relationships because you don't value them.

Roger: Peggy, can you get me some coffee?
Peggy: No.

Psychiatry is just this year's candy pink stove.