Ross Geller Quotes
Joey: Yeah. Uh, oh, the best part, come on. (Leads them to the bathroom) Huh?
Rachel: Hey, nice toilet.
Joey: No no no, behind it.
Ross: You have a phone in here?
Joey: That's right, I have a phone in here.
Monica: Joey, promise me something.
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: Never call me from that phone.
Monica: Ross, I hated you when we were kids.
Ross: You hated me when we were kids?
Monica: Yes. I hated you. I mean I, I, loved you in a "you're my brother so I have to" kind of way, but basically, yeah, I hated your guts.
Joey: (Showing off his new, horribly tacky apartment). Huh? So what do you think? Casa de Joey. Huh? (Proudly) I decorated it myself.
Ross: Get out.
All: No!
(To Monica) I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, "God I hope they get together."
Phoebe: I'm getting a tattoo.
Ross: A tattoo? Why would you wanna do that?
Rachel: Don't you think that would be kinda cool?
Ross: No, sorry I don't. Why would anyone pay someone to scar their body for life? What if it doesn't come out right, Pheebs, and it's like I own a bad haircut all the time? (Awkward silence) Why is everyone staring at me?
Ross: You got a tattoo?
Rachel: Yeah, but just a little one. Phoebe got the whole world!
Judy: Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
Ross: Uh, actually Mom, I think Monica thanked him for the both of us.
Jack: Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche. You... you got your own little speedster.
Richard: Guys. Seriously, it is not like that.
Jack: Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou...
Ross: Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.
Ross: (About arriving at her parents' house with Richard) All right, shall we?
Monica: Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait. You know what? Ross, let's, let's switch places. You get in the middle. No un-, ya know, unless this looks like we're trying to cover something up.
Ross: Monica, Monica, you could come in straddling him, they still wouldn't believe it.
Joey: (While packing) Hey, you guys are still going to come visit me, right?
Ross: Oh yeah, you got the big TV. We'll be over there all the time... (Chandler gives him a look) except when we are here.
Ross: Mon, Mon, are you okay?
Monica: You remember that video I found of mom and dad?
Ross: Yeah.
Monica: Well, I just caught the live show.
Ross: Eww.
Rachel: (Checking to see if Monica's home, because she is kissing Ross) Monica!
Ross: It would really help when I'm kissing you if you didn't shout out my sister's name.