Earth to Hamel-tard. You're blocking my way.


Xo: How can I help?
Jane: When he opens his mouth, will you stuff my boob in it like it's a hamburger?
Xo: Honey, I am all over it.

I did this. I brought the paparazzi upon her. If I hadn't retweeted that Amber Alert... I never thought I'd feeling anything but #blessed to be famous, but now I'm feeling #cursed.


The blind priest just ran away.


So if by ingratiate myself you mean dazzle her with my Sherlockian genius then yes, that's exactly what I mean.


Dad, when it comes to your sex life, how about we stick to the After School Special version.


It's my pony. You can't pet it.


Be honest with yourself and be honest with your husband.


My son is a lot of things. Some of them good, some of them not so good but he is someone you can always count on and that is a rare thing, kiddo.


Beckett: Martha, we're not getting a divorce.
Martha: Well, call me old fashioned but don't married couples live together?

Beckett: It's complicated.
Martha: So were his last two divorces.

I'll say this, the girl's got spunk.