Michael: He's not a chicken. He just doesn't like confined spaces, that's all.
Gob: I thought it was open spaces.
Buster: No, it's both.

Michael: Thanks for coming out, buddy. I've been dying to get some time with you, I really have.
George Michael: That's ok. I know how much you care about me. Unfortunately, so does the federal government.

Buster: I'm a scholar. I enjoy scholarly pursuits.
Lucille: Suddenly, playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit.

Michael: How'd you know I was here?
Gob: I called the office. You know, that Kitty is starting to sound pretty damn sexy to me. Maybe I ought to ...
Michael: That was Lindsay.

Maeby: You don't have to worry so much. I mean, obviously your dad doesn't want to spend time with you, but, you know, go to the beach or whatever.
George Michael: He's just not around, ok?
Annyong: He no have father? Old lady adopt him, too?
Maeby: No, he have father. Father no love him.

White Power Bill: No more teaching from you.
George Sr.: No teaching, no teaching.
Narrator: It was at that moment that George Sr. reunited with his son-in-law.
George Sr.: Tobias, what the hell are you doing here?
Tobias: I'm here to study with you. To learn from you. Teach me.
George Sr.: There's no teaching. There's no teaching.

This is not how we settle things on a site. We got our own way of finding out who's a chicken. By a little game we like to call ... "Chicken."

Foreman

Let's see, now. 187 won't be free till Tuesday ... at midnight. And I can't put you into 212 because there's already another actor researching a role in there. Steve Buscemi.

Warden Gentiles

Well, now, who the hell is going to unload the car? (Into phone) Hola? Is Rosa still alive? No? Oh. Ok. This is not my day.

Lucille

Maeby: I thought your dad worked last weekend.
George Michael: No, last week he had to finish planning the new subdivision.
Maeby: Oh. So, did he finish it?
George Michael: No. Hey, are you trying to make me feel bad?
Maeby: Yeah, I guess. Sorry, I'm just bored.
George Michael: That's ok.
Maeby: I guess he just likes work more than he likes you.

Buster: I need a different job. I'm having real trouble in a confined, indoor space.
Michael: How do you feel about working outdoors?
Buster: Uh ... What else do you have?

Ted: We, uh, finished the proposal and, uh, we're gonna order some pizza. Um, we were wondering if we could have two toppings, on account of it's Saturday.
Lindsay: Well, he's not here, and since I'm in charge, I'm taking you all out to lunch.

Arrested Development Season 1 Episode 15 Quotes

Gob: I hope you're up to this, Buster! This is a game of courage! A game for men!
Buster: Yeah, well, it's a game I'm ready for! Uh-oh. My seat doesn't have a cushion.

Lindsay: Okay, so you guys don't want to work? Fine. I've got a stair car full of Mexican laborers that would love a day's work.
Lupe's Uncle: Laborers? I'm a professor of American studies at the University of Mexico City.