Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Thursdays 8:00 PM on NBCBrooklyn Nine-Nine Season 1 Quotes
All Fire Marshals are doofuses, but Boone is King Doofus of Doofus Island.
Jake
Diaz: When this is over, I’m going to find you, and I’m going to break those little fingers. Judge: Ms Diaz, please stop threatening the stenographer!
Holt: You look like a corpse we just pulled out of the river. Peralta: Wrong – I look like a cool rock star who OD’d in his own pool.
Santiago: Pretty hungover? Peralta: Shhhhh...turn off your mouth siren...
I’ve got some stories that will make Training Day look like Super Troopers.
Peralta
Holt: Why do you idolize that man and the time he wrote about? Peralta: Because the 70s were amazing! Everyone had big juicy mustaches and all the clothes were orange...and flammable.
Brogan: I once saw Kaminski choke a hippie to death with his own ponytail. Peralta: Awesome! Santiago: Illegal.
Santiago: You go through doors normally, and everyone calls you pineapples.
Peralta: My grandma calls me pineapples, and I regret telling you that.
“The Squad” is the best book I ever read, and I’ve read 15 books.
Peralta
Don’t worry; I know what I’m doing. I saw the first 15 minutes of The Hurt Locker.
Peralta
