Hope: All that Mayberry: RFD stuff, do you buy it, any of it?

You're sensitive about getting an ex-priest into the sack so you can grab his elephant.

Xander

(to Kate) Stefano is a bastard. He's evil incarnate. We've both known that for decades.

Victor

Wait, wait. You have to continue bedding her to make sure the deal doesn't get blown. Is that what you call being a good lawyer, Justin or a whore.

Adrienne

But if you do anything to hurt my daughter you'll have to answer to me and just so we're clear that rap sheet included running someone over with a car, so you understand.

Eve

Will, missing a birthday is messing up. Cheating is a betrayal of everything that a marriage is suppose to be.

Adrienne

You are on the ground and my heel is on your throat after all these years.

Jennifer

Abigail: At least she is consistent. She's always a bitch.
Melanie: It's almost an art form for her.

(about Theresa) You know what? That girl could really use a hug or electro-shock therapy.

Nicole

(to Theresa) It's so ironic that you work in human resources since you're not a human and you don't have any resources.

Melanie

Trying to be nice gets you nowhere in this town.

Nicole

You want to explain to me why you took all your clothes off and got into bed with my son. Were you helping him with his science project?

Jennifer