(to another inmate) Don't judge me, you're not in here because you were caught helping the poor.

Gabrielle

Tom: Hey, what's wrong?
Lynette: (Crying) Because of me, my son's imaginary friend got crushed by a garbage truck. I am the worst person in the world.
Tom: Honey, he is gonna get over this in no time. Trust me. And one day, when he is all grown up, you and Parker are gonna laugh hysterically about this.
Lynette: You really think so? Really?
Tom: I promise.

Tom: What have you done to Mrs. Mulburry?
Lynette: Until there's a body, there's no evidence of a crime.

Parker: Daddy! I can't find Mrs. Mulburry's umbrella! Where is it?
Tom: Well, I don't know, sport. Honey, have you seen the umbrella?
Lynette: No.. can't say that I have...
Tom: OK, listen, don't worry about it. I'm sure Mrs. Mulburry's here somewhere.
Lynette: Or... huh...Maybe she's not. She could have... left. You know... maybe she had some other little boy she needed to help.
Parker: Like who?
Lynette: I don't know. It could be.... huh.. a little boy in... England. Named Spencer.
Tom: Lynette...?
Lynette: I mean... it is possible that someone like little Spencer needed Mrs. Mulburry more, 'cause... he doesn't have a daddy and a mommy, who love him. Yeah, that's it. He's an orphan!... with no hands!

Lynette: Tom, he attacked a teacher with an umbrella!
Tom: It was a poke, he poked her.

Susan: So I threw the ice cream at him and ran. (Pauses) Somebody say something.
Gabrielle: Thank God you were wearing flats.

Gabrielle: Are you hitting on me?
David: What would you say if I was?
Gabrielle: I'd say I'm pregnant.

(To Susan about Zach) So what's going to happen to little creepy when he gets here?

Edie

(narrating) The world is filled with good fathers. How do we recongnize them? They are the ones who are missed so terribly, everything falls apart in their absence. (Shot of Andrew and Bree packing his suitcase, placing a photo of Rex inside last.) They are the ones who love us, long before we even arrive. (Shot of Carlos smiling as he rubs Gabrielle's stomach.) They are the ones who come looking for us, when we can't find our way home. (Shot of Mike walking Bongo as he looks at a flyer of Zach's) Yes, the world is filled with good fathers. And the best are the ones who make the women in their lives feel like good mothers (Shot of Tom comforting Lynette as she cries)

Mary Alice

Lynette: I couldn't find Mrs. Mulberry's umbrella, so I brought her her sun hat instead, all right? And, here we go.
Parker: It's in the shower.
Lynette: What?
Parker: Mrs. Mulberry said she left it in the shower.
Lynette: Well, why didn't Mrs. Mulberry volunteer that information before I turned your room upside down looking for it, hmm?
Parker: (Pauses) So are you gonna go get it?
Lynette: No, I'm not going to get the damn umbrella!

Bree: Honey, the feelings that you're having are perfectly normal, but George isn't trying to take your father's place. He's, well, he's just a friend.
Andrew: Really? Just a friend? So you're not planning on getting more serious with this guy in the future?
Bree: You know, I haven't even thought about it.
Andrew: You're so transparent, it's pathetic. You're worried about a ripped T-shirt humiliating this family? Wait 'till people see that you're dating the town nerd less than a month after your husband's funeral.

Bree: Andrew, don't you have a meet at the swim club?
Andrew: Yeah. So?
Bree: Doesn't it require a large entrance fee? One that you can't afford by yourself?
Andrew: Are you blackmailing me into coming into dinner?
Bree: Oh, you don't know the lengths I'd go to for even seating.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 16 in total

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Desperate Housewives Season 2 Episode 4 Quotes

Lynette: I couldn't find Mrs. Mulberry's umbrella, so I brought her her sun hat instead, all right? And, here we go.
Parker: It's in the shower.
Lynette: What?
Parker: Mrs. Mulberry said she left it in the shower.
Lynette: Well, why didn't Mrs. Mulberry volunteer that information before I turned your room upside down looking for it, hmm?
Parker: (Pauses) So are you gonna go get it?
Lynette: No, I'm not going to get the damn umbrella!

The residents of the Fairview County Jail looked forward to every Tuesday. That was the day that Gabrielle Solis came to visit her husband. The inmates went out of their way to give her compliments whether she wanted them to or not. With each visit, these accolades became increasingly inventive. Still Gabrielle was not flattered. In fact, Gabrielle started to dread this special attention.

Mary Alice
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