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Desperate Housewives
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Season 6, Episode 8: "The Coffee Cup"

Katherine: Not only did Susan shoot me at point blank range, she trashed me to all my friends and neighbors.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Gabrielle: I'm been home-schooling my daughter and it's been a living Hell, so I tried to bribe someone to get her into Catholic school.

  • Rating: UnratedPermalink

Season 6, Episode 7: "Careful the Things You Say"

Gabrielle: Hey, cut her some slack. She's Romanian, okay? When your people are being chased into Argentina by angry cossacks, maybe a sparkling toilet isn't that important.
Carlos: Argentina? How about you stick to fractions, and I'll teach Juanita geography? Goodbye.
  • Rating: 5.5 / 10Permalink
Lynette: She was pissed when I didn't tell her you might be pregnant. If I don't tell her about this, I'm dead.
Julie: Come on, Lynette.
Lynette: I'm serious! She already shot Katherine. Now she's got a taste for blood.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink

Season 6, Episode 6: "Don't Walk on the Grass"

Lynette: (holding a worldmap) There you go, Gaby. It's kinda old. It's from before the Soviet Union broke up.
Gabrielle: The Soviet Union broke up?
Tom: You sure you know what you're doing with this homeschooling thing?
Gabrielle: Oh, honey, Juanita's in first grade. She'll believe what I tell her.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Gabrielle: Let me tell you something, Mrs. Peterson. I am pulling Juanita out of this crappy, crappy school! Come on, Carlos!
Mrs. Peterson: Crappy, huh? What a shame Juanita won't be here to blurt that out during the Pledge of Allegiance!
Gabrielle: Oh, yeah? Well, here's a blurt for ya: (@!#$%^&*!?) ... and the horse you rode in on!
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink

Season 6, Episode 5: "Everybody Ought to Have a Maid"

Laura: You're pretty cavalier considering your carelessness almost killed my daughter.
Gabrielle: I gotta say, Laura, you're kind of a wet blanket since you quit smoking. Why don't you try a pipe?
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Mike: Honey, let her have her lies. Let her plot. You got nothing to worry about. You mean everything to me and Katherine means nothing.
Susan: Well, that's sweet. I'm gonna go tell her you said that.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Mrs. McCluskey: Lynette, when you've needed a favor from me, have I ever let you down?
Lynette: Last month we needed a sitter for Penny, but you didn't want to miss Oktoberfest. And just last thursday...
Mrs. McCluskey: Okay, new way in.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
Lynette: This would be a really good place for you to jump in and tell me I'm not a castrating bitch
Tom: Sure! Just put down the knife first.
  • Rating: UnratedPermalink
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Total Quotes: 246

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Previous Episode

The Coffee Cup
"The Coffee Cup"
Sun, November 15

Quotes

Gabrielle: Hey, cut her some slack. She's Romanian, okay? When your people are being chased into Argentina by angry cossacks, maybe a sparkling toilet isn't that important.
Carlos: Argentina? How about you stick to fractions, and I'll teach Juanita geography? Goodbye.
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