Desperate Housewives

Desperate Housewives "No Fits, No Fights, No Feuds" Quotes

Tom: I don't want you to be afraid to take a firm hand with Kayla. She is part of our family now and.. you know what that means.
Lynette: Yeah! I should treat her as badly as I treat my own children.
 • Rating: Unrated

Alma: (to Orson) So, what is it with you and redheads?
 • Rating: Unrated

Alma: Bree Hodge? I'm Alma Hodge. I believe we have someone in common.
 • Rating: Unrated

Andrew: Austin's not gay. Not even after three beers...Don't ask.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lynette: Well, gotta hand it to her. Just when you think Bree's thrown every conceivable theme party she hosts a Shame on you for thinking my husband killed someone dinner.
 • Rating: Unrated

Edie: I think Wisteria Lane is the place for you.
Alma: Good. More than anything I just wanna fit in.
Mary Alice: (narrating) Oh you will, Alma. You absolutely will.
 • Rating: Unrated

Florist: (to Gabrielle) What's to explain? A pretty girl gets flowers do you know many girls never get flowers. I work in a flower shop, I've never got any freaking flowers, so stop your whining about who sent them and just be glad he did.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bree: Now that we're all assembled I'd like to introduce the guest of honor. I hope you'll all be as delighted to meet her as I was. You can come in now.
(Alma enters.)
Bree: Everyone, this is Alma Hodge, Orson's first wife.
(The ladies stare at Bree, then at Alma.)
Bree: (to Susan) Oh, about that apology, anytime you're ready.
 • Rating: Unrated

Carlos: (to Gabrielle) Gabby if I was gonna send you flowers I wouldn't send pink roses, I'd send you white orchids, because I know they're your favorite, and if I wanted to cheer you up sunflowers, and for the flu, blue irises.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Carlos: Why would I send you flowers?
Gabrielle: To sabotage my new relationship! (nods to Bill)
Carlos: Oh, picnic boy? What do I care if you go out with him?
 • Rating: Unrated

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