Russ: Hi.
Chandler: Oh, hey.
Phoebe: Hi.
Russ: I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
Chandler: Yeah, I'm sorry man.
Russ: Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?
Phoebe: Oh I do, it's... it's Bob Saget. She hates him.

Russ: You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.
Ross: Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can major in. It's like day one, floss. Day two, here's your diploma.

Chandler: (Entering his apartment to find Joey making lots of food) Hey.
Joey: Hey.
Chandler: Whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or... uh, Italy called and said it was hungry.

Phoebe: Okay, so, you know what you're doing, right?
Rachel: Uh.... waitressing?
Phoebe: Well, yeah, but... no. I mean, um... doesn't Russ just remind you of someone?
Rachel: (Looks at Russ) Huh, Bob Saget?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah!

Chandler: Guess who's back in show business?
Phoebe: Lorne Green?
Chandler: No, no Pheebs. You know why? 'Cause he's dead.
Phoebe: Oh, no.
Chandler: Okay, I guess this is gonna seem kind of bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.

Joey: (About Fun Bobby) Monica, have you ever been with him when he wasn't drinking?
Monica: Well, we just happen to go to a lot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.

Monica: (About Fun Bobby) So he drank a lot tonight.
Ross: Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a drink in his hand.
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh yeah, you know, did you notice how he always starts his stories with "I was so wasted" or "Oh, we were so bombed" or "So I wake up, and I'm in this dumpster in Connecticut."

When I was little, I wanted to be a veterinarian, but then I found out you had to put your hands into cows and stuff.

Joey

Rachel: I kind of have plans.
Monica: You have other friends?
Rachel: Yeah, I, uh, I have a date.
Monica: What?
Phoebe: You have a date?
Rachel: Yes! I have a date.
Joey: With a man?
Rachel: No, with a crouton. What is so strange about me having a date?
Chandler: With a crouton?

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