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Chandler: (About Monica's date) Fun Bobby? Your ex-boyfriend Fun Bobby?
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: You know more than one Fun Bobby?
Chandler: I happen to know a Fun Bob.

Monica: (About a disheveled Rachel) Oh my gosh! Rachel, honey... Are you okay? Where Paolo?
Rachel: Rome. Jerk missed his flight.
Phoebe: And then... your face bloated?

Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
(He removes the coat to reveal an elf costume)
Chandler: Too many jokes... must mock Joey!
Joey: Nice shoes, huh? (He wiggles his foot and the bells tinkle)
Chandler: Ahh, you're killing me!

Rachel: Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you.
Phoebe: Yeah, you wish!

Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!


Joey: You seen Sandy?
Chandler: I don't know how to tell you this but she's in Monica's bedroom getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. Oh, look at that I did know how to tell you.

Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just going to be your last chance with me.


Phoebe: David's like, you know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Monica: I think it's romantic.
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
Rachel: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, he's kind of like the guy I went to see that with.

Monica: Do you always have to bring him here?
Ross: Look, I didn't wanna leave him alone. All right? We ... we had our first fight this morning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean, and he threw some feces ...
Chandler: You know, if you're gonna work late I could look in on him for you.
Ross: Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do, make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay, and you're not, like, doing it as a favor to me.
Chandler: Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.

Ross: Par-tay! (Ross enters Monica's party with Marcel on his shoulders)
Monica: That thing is not coming in here.
Ross: That thing? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask you something, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in your home?
Monica: I'm guessing your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table.
Ross: Hey, he was more embarrassed by that than anybody. And for him to have the courage to walk back in here like nothing happened...

Janice: I love this artichoke thing! Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the diet starts tomorrow! (Laughs her annoying Janice laugh)
Chandler: You remember Janice.
Monica: Vividly.

Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
Ross: Just a smidge.

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