Futurama Season 1 Quotes
Farnsworth: But suppose we send a crew to plant an explosive precisely on the fault line betwen this mass of coffee grounds and this deposit of America Online floppy disks.
Military Man: In theory, it could work.
Wernstrom: Uh, in theory, perhaps. But you'll never find a crew willing to take on a mission so suicidally dangerous.
Bender: Oh crap!
But garbage isn't something you just find lying on the streets of Manhattan!
Mayor
Bender: I've been perusing your fortified wine list and I've selected the '71 Hobo's Delight, the '57 Chateau Part and the '66 Thunder Chevitz.
Waiter: Exquisite choices, sir.
Bender: And mix them all together in a big jug.
Farnsworth: Wait! If we could build an object the exact size, density and consistency of the garbage ball, it might just knock the ball away without smashing it to bits.
Leela: But where can we find a substance the exact density and consistency as garbage?
Farnsworth: Alas, I don't know.
Fry: Uh, what about garbage?
Fry: Who's that jerk?
Farnsworth: A hundred years ago he was my most promising student at Mars University. But then, after one fateful pop-quiz...
Flashback
Wernstrom: A-minus? No one gives Ogden Wernstrom an A-minus!
Farnsworth: I'm sorry, but penmanship counts.
Wernstrom: I swear I'll have my revenge even if it takes me a hundred years.
Flashback ends
Farnsworth: And here it is: Slightly over 99 years later and still no revenge. I'm essentially in the clear.
It's time to take action... Stephanie, cancel the maid for today. Have her come tomorrow... Well, I'm out of ideas. Anyone?
Poopenmeyer
Farnsworth: Wernstrom!
Wernstrom: The very same.
In lighter news, the city of New New York is doomed. Blame rests with known human Professor Hubert Farnsworth and his tiny, inferior brain.
Morbo
(Bender pulls string on Bart Doll)
Bart Doll: Eat my shorts!
Bender: Ok! (eats Bart Doll's shorts) Mmmm...shorts.
Fry: Hey! You have no right to criticise the 20th century. We gave the world the lightbulb, the steamboat and the cotton gin.
Leela: Those things are all from the 19th century.
Fry: Yeah, well, they probably just copied us.
Farnsworth: I'm a dried up husk of a scientist. This is all my fault.
Fry: No, it's my fault too. I'm sure I threw out more than my share of that trash up there. Also, one month my toilet broke and it just went straight in the garbage can.
Poopenmeyer: This city's been garbage-free for 500 years!
Fry: Then it's time to make some more.
Poopenmeyer: Make garbage? But how?
