Kirk: Luke, where's your lost and found?
Luke: Outside, in the dumpster.

Luke Danes: What can I get you Kirk?
Kirk Gleason: Patty melt and a coke.
Luke Danes: You want the melt cut into squares or stars today?
Kirk Gleason: Half and half.

Green is the new pink!

Sherry Tinsdale

Hey, I have an idea! Why don't you just pretend we did and go around acting really immature. Oh wait...

Rory

Rory: Grandma was only trying to help.
Lorelai: Do you still believe in Santa Claus?

Emily: Why are you throwing cutlery in a public place?
Lorelai: Uh, 'cause I feel stupid doing it at home?

(to Lorelai) I think you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen -- outside of a really filthy magazine.

Kirk

Lorelai: But this goes against every rule I have in the Gilmore Survival Guide. Number one: No running with scissors. Number two: No page-boy haircuts. Number three: Never, ever have lunch alone with the mother.

Lane: I have got to do something!
Rory: Run around the block!
Lane: Why?
Rory: I don't know!
Lane: Good enough for me. (dashes out of the room)

Lorelai: So I think I'm in touch with the other side.
Rory: The other side of...
Lorelai: The other side.
Rory: With Republicans?

Luke: Hey, wait now. You're talking crazy talk trying to confuse me now, aren't you?
Lorelai: Aren't you!
Luke: What?
Lorelai: Who?
Luke: Stop it!
Lorelai: Bye!

(about the teenagers in the class that she was trying to give a speech to) They were coming at me like I was Poland and they were Nazis!

Lorelai

Gilmore Girls Quotes

Max: Thank you for last night.
Lorelai: It was a good night, wasn't it?
Max: Several novels will be written about it.
Lorelai: I say we do it again, and next time I'll be the gypsy queen.

Luke: Me? Raising a kid? I don't even like kids. They're always sticky like they've got jam on their hands. Even if there's no jam in the house, somehow, they've always got jam on their hands! I'm not the right guy to deal with that. I have no patience for jam hands!
Lorelai: First of all, Jess is 17 so I think he's probably pass the jam hands stage by now. Second of all, you can do this. If you want to you are totally capable.