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Kirk: Luke, where's your lost and found?
Luke: Outside, in the dumpster.

Luke Danes: What can I get you Kirk?
Kirk Gleason: Patty melt and a coke.
Luke Danes: You want the melt cut into squares or stars today?
Kirk Gleason: Half and half.

Green is the new pink!

Sherry Tinsdale

Hey, I have an idea! Why don't you just pretend we did and go around acting really immature. Oh wait...

Rory

Rory: Grandma was only trying to help.
Lorelai: Do you still believe in Santa Claus?

Emily: Why are you throwing cutlery in a public place?
Lorelai: Uh, 'cause I feel stupid doing it at home?

(to Lorelai) I think you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen -- outside of a really filthy magazine.

Kirk

Lorelai: But this goes against every rule I have in the Gilmore Survival Guide. Number one: No running with scissors. Number two: No page-boy haircuts. Number three: Never, ever have lunch alone with the mother.

Lane: I have got to do something!
Rory: Run around the block!
Lane: Why?
Rory: I don't know!
Lane: Good enough for me. (dashes out of the room)

Lorelai: So I think I'm in touch with the other side.
Rory: The other side of...
Lorelai: The other side.
Rory: With Republicans?

Luke: Hey, wait now. You're talking crazy talk trying to confuse me now, aren't you?
Lorelai: Aren't you!
Luke: What?
Lorelai: Who?
Luke: Stop it!
Lorelai: Bye!

(about the teenagers in the class that she was trying to give a speech to) They were coming at me like I was Poland and they were Nazis!

Lorelai
Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 1108 in total

Gilmore Girls Quotes

Babette: Oh! Rory, Sweety! Hold on there, baby.
Rory: Hey, Babette. Is everything okay?
Babette: I should be asking you that question. Come here. Let me see that arm. Oh, you poor little thing. How you doin', huh?
Rory: I'm doing fine.
Babette: Ah, look at ya' being brave like that after all you've been through. Geeze! It's so hard being a woman! Isn't it?
Rory: I guess.
Babette: I mean you got your morals and your standards and your good common sense and then, BAM! You meet some guy and then all that goes right out the window.
Rory: But...
Babette: For every good woman, there's a dirty little wolf just ready to lead her astray. you can't help it. He's got the eyes, the chin, chest hair you could carpet your dining room with. What's a woman to do? We're not made of steal for God's sakes.
Rory: Babette...
Babette: I was in a cult once. Did I tell you that?
Rory: No!
Babette: I met this guy once, gorgeous, tan, looked just like Mickey Hargitay. We had coffee. He gave me a pamphlet. Next thing you know, I'm wearin' a moomoo playing the tambourine jumping up and down at the airport.
Rory: Okay, I really have to get inside.
Babette: Oh, sure hon, sure. You go take good care of yourself, and don't be embarrassed toots. This has happened to all of us.

Rory: Good night, Dodger.
Jess: What?
Rory: Figure it out.
Jess: Oliver Twist.

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